/ 25 September 2002

Mexican Horror & Physics Lessons from Britney

If you’re new to computers, then you’ll have discovered the wall of jargon before. But don’t get embarrassed: just try these next sites where you can look up whatever word you want, and find out exactly what it means. First, try the Geek-Speak IT Glossary; then have a look at File Formats.

Given that the Big Brother contestants all seem to have been chosen for lack of IQ and having been beaten repeatedly with an ugly stick, why not take a look at a ‘reality TV’ concept that requires some brains to succeed with. The concept is simple – ten inmates, one jail; and their mission? Escape. Go take a look and wish local TV channels would buy the series called Jailbreak.

Once upon a time when the world was officially at war, there were bomb shelters in the UK to house the population and a lot of them are still around. Go take a look at a slice of history at The Bomb Shelters of Plymouth.

The best kinds of movies are usually horror films, and then the most fun quadrant of that genre tends to be BAD horror movies. But there’s another subdivision, worthy of the attention of Joe Bob Briggs: get your popcorn ready to throw at the screen at Bad Mexican Horror Films!

It occurred to me that perhaps readers might not know who Joe Bob Briggs is – so here’s a quick film geek lesson. A movie critic in Texas began seeing that there were a lot of movies that were so bad, in all honesty they couldn’t be reviewed in the normal way. So he came up with a persona — a beer-drinking, drive-in goin’ redneck called ‘Joe Bob Briggs’ — to give his own beer ‘n popcorn guzzlin’ spin on the B-Movie genre. A number of books have been released of Joe Bob’s reviews, he has a long-running brilliant film-review TV show, and he’s become a cult icon all by himself. Go to his website at Joe Bob Briggs!

Do you dislike wasting time on going to to see the latest films the local distributors have released here, months after the rest of the world has seen them? To find out the storyline and endings of all the new movies (thus saving you money), go to Knee Jerk Spoilers.

In keeping with the high moral tone of this week’s column, and assuming you’re as curious about vibrators as the next person who’s never owned one or known anyone who has — give yourself some privacy as you examine a brief article on the history of those things.

Most people think all Britney Spears does is count her money and secretly laugh at the people who think she has talent — well, that’s undoubtedly true. However, just to show another side of this bimbo from hell, go discover the joys of Britney Spears’ Guide to Semi Conductor Physics!

So you remember that movie about the nun and the condemned prisoner — Dead Man Walking — well, why not take a look at the real-life nun behind the character that was played in the movie. Go to Report From the Front.

Feel like making life difficult for anyone wanting to snoop on your data (especially now that the government has demonstrated a desire to invade your privacy)? Why not start getting into hiding your data inside common picture files? Go take a look at a growing alternate to the standard encryption methods, at Steganography.

If any travel agents are reading this and would like to sponsor me, I’m ready to go — picture a tour company that promises to put you in the line of huge storms, shrieking 300-mile-an-hour winds, tornados and possibly some danger as well. Operating in the ‘Tornado Alley’ belt of the US, this company’s tours look like a LOT of fun. Go take a look at Tempest Tours!

Until the next time, if Big Brother fans dont get me.

Ian Fraser is a playwright, author, comedian, conspiracy nut, old-time radio collector and self-confessed data-junkie. Winner of numerous Vita and Amstel Awards, he’s been an Internet addict and games-fanatic since around 1995, when the Internet began to make much more sense than theatre.