A LION killed a Mozambican illegal immigrant and dragged his body through the town of Phalaborwa, Limpopo Province, said the police on Sunday. Inspector James Ngoepe said the lion had since disappeared and the police and SA National Defence Force (SANDF) were still searching for the animal. Ngoepe said the immigrant, aged around 35, illegally crossed the border to South Africa and then hiked through the Kruger National Park, where he sat down for a rest and apparently fell asleep. Ngoepe said police believed the lion attacked him while he was sleeping and then dragged his body into town. – Sapa
THEY SAID IT, from Sapa
“Savimbi decided to rest. Confident, as always, he had nonetheless placed his units on alert. Too late, we already had surprised them. He fought back with gunfire, and that’s why he was killed. We nailed him seven times. He tried to resist with his gun, but then he was dead.”
– Brigadier-General Simao Carlitos Wala of the Angolan government forces, who lead the attack in which Unita leader Jonas Savimbi was killed.
“Unita is a cause. It is essentially a political project which… will continue to strive to realise its fundamental principles, which consist of justice, peace and reconciliation…”
– A Unita statement following Savimbi’s death.
“I don’t care whether they call it a pilot or whether they call it a full roll-out, as long as no woman who is pregnant and needing nevirapine will be sent back from any public institution on the basis that it cannot be provided in this particular hospital because it is confined to certain sites.”
– Congress of SA Trade Unions general secretary Zwelinzima Vavi.
“HIV causes Aids. In KwaZulu-Natal this axiom of science is not open for bizarre personal theories that has no link with reality.”
— KwaZulu-Natal Premier Lionel Mtshali.
“Adopting a maverick view and sticking to it have served him well.”
– Newsweek in an article about President Thabo Mbeki.
“This badly written movie script camouflaging as an analysis, carries all the fictitious elements of scandal, lies, deceit and betrayal with the sole purpose of creating destabilisation within the ANC, its leadership and in government.”
– African National Congress spokesman Smuts Ngonyama about the Newsweek article.
“This seems to be saying to the people of this country that the ultimate price you as taxpayers and receivers of services will pay is none of your business.”
– Inkatha Freedom Party MP Gavin Woods, who resigned as chairman of the public accounts committee. He was reacting to the joint investigating team into the multi-billion rand arms acquisition programme which said that the decision about what the country could afford or not was ultimately a political choice.
“The best weapon against terror is to share your riches with the poor. Within a family a grandmother or a baby is not told they can only eat according to their contribution.”
– Archbishop emeritus Desmond Tutu, who told churchgoers in the United States that according to the Bible, their Secretary of State, Colin Powell, and Osama bin Laden were brothers in the same family.
“If it’s in your blood, it’s in your blood. If you reach breakpoint, you just swallow a few tranquillisers and go on.”
– Inspector Arrie Snyman of the Germiston flying squad. The police car in which he and his colleague, Inspector Pierre van Jaarsveld, were travelling, was hit by 20 AK47 bullets, of which three lodged in Snyman’s headrest.
“Tell me about another job where you can have the best view from your office while receiving room service at the same time.”
– Mpho Mamashela, SA Airways’ first black captain.
“I tried to tell my mother over the phone about our find, but she didn’t believe me and eventually I just had to tell her that I was joking.”
– Ian Kruger, who found a 1kg bar of gold on the floor of a parking lot at Sandton City.
“Street names will change, province names will change and (former) judge Willem Heath will not save your colonial teddy bears.”
– Western Cape Premier Peter Marais. He said his province was formulating a policy to change derogatory and insulting names.
“Nude tourism to South Africa is big and Sandy Bay is its beach. It’s a legal, legitimate nudist beach but it’s been invaded by a bunch of peeping toms who lurch around between the sand dunes wearing pants.”
– Nudist Beau Brummell, who wants Sandy Bay to be reserved for whites. He said British tourists had complained that black men were “lurking behind the sand dunes like Peeping Toms and looking at their wives”.
“If white men had never peeked at black women, there wouldn’t be any coloured people today.”
– Western Cape Premier Peter Marais in response to Brummell’s suggestion.
“I am sure white people were not the first ones to walk around naked in Africa.”
– Marais.