Review: Volkswagen Phaeton
W hen Adolf Hitler and Ferdinand Porsche discussed what they thought was the perfect car for the masses back in the early 1930s their ideas were remarkably in tune.
Hitler wanted a car that could accommodate two adults and three children at a cruising speed of 100kph while sipping no more than six litres for every 100km that it travelled across the United States of Germany. Maintenance costs should be low, and the car had to cost no more than 1 000 Reichsmark — approximately £100.
“So, waddya think?” asked the führer, a car enthusiast who knew that Porsche had long been planning a small, affordable and reliable car of his own. Porsche wrote back in January 1934, saying that he envisaged seating for four persons and a top speed of just 100kph but with the best road-holding characteristics possible. He pointed out that he was against building the car too inexpensively.
“Such a car can be cheap to buy, but can never be cheap to use, if only because its value to the consumer is very low, owing to the reduction in comfort and durability,” he told Hitler. And so was born the very first Volkswagen — the Beetle.
Of course, Porsche might have been keen on simply mobilising the masses, but Hitler’s motives were less philanthropic. The final specification, approved by him, contained a couple of refinements. When the seats weren’t in use by three adults and a child, the car needed to be able to carry three soldiers and a machine-gun with ammunition.
All of which has nothing to do with the soon-to-be-launched Volkswagen Phaeton whatsoever, except to show just how easy it is to start on one theme and end up on another. According to the Volkswagen people themselves — and who’s better qualified to say so — there’s no detail of the Phaeton that rings a bell even remotely with any previous Volkswagen model, except the badge on the steering wheel. In fact, the car’s branding is hopelessly inappropriate — very few of the volks will be able to afford this wagen. But then, the new VW isn’t aimed at the masses. The target market consists of the nouveau riche — bright young things from the advertising or information technology industries, who want something different but wouldn’t be seen dead in anything as ostentatious as a Bentley.
The Phaeton may not be flashy, but it’s sure going to be quick. It offers 309kW and 550 Newton-metres of torque from a six-litre 12-cylinder engine (in the most powerful version) to make sure of that. And just because you’d rather drive a Veedubs than a Roller doesn’t mean you have to go without, in terms of luxury or safety. All-wheel drive is standard, along with air suspension, and every item in the running gear is designed to cope with speeds of up to 300kph. A galvanised steel body shell keeps the rust at bay, and aluminium boot and bonnet lids keep the weight down.
Inside, four-zone climate control allows front- and rear-seat passengers to establish their own cosy little comfort zones. The system, called Climatronic, is claimed to be absolutely draught-free and boasts an integrated humidity control, which means you’ll never have to suffer misted-up windows again. It would have come in handy in Stalingrad in the winter of 1942, no doubt.
Dominating the interior of the Phaeton is a large centre console fitted with a seven-inch colour monitor. Eight basic function keys control virtually all of the television, audio, comfort, navigation, telephone and on-board computer functions. But that’s no big deal these days. You have to offer more than a mobile computer playstation to be outstanding these days, and Volkswagen fully expects the Phaeton to be just that. In the W12 Phaeton the front seats are 18-way adjustable, with a memory system and air conditioning to cool your bum while you hum down the freeway, and a massage function in the padding to ease those stressed-out muscles after a long trek down the autobahn. And, for those who want to do away with the familiar bench seat in the back, individual rear seats with 10-way adjustment are available as an option.
The Phaeton was first aired at the Geneva Motor Show earlier this month, and will be available in Europe and the United States from about May.
Will we get it here in South Africa? Probably not at your local VW dealership, but if you threaten to commit suicide by jumping off your cheque-book I’m sure VWSA will be willing to bring one in to dissuade you. How much? Ask the company, but an unofficial starting point of around R700 000 has been rumoured as akick-off point.