This is the week that ANC President Mbeki warped logic forever. Particularly in saying that anyone complaining about his wasteful trip to Haiti is clearly against celebrating the wonderful dignity of a nation who successfully freed themselves from slavery, and this had lessons to teach us.
But the truth is that Haiti is — in effect — an utterly economically useless, ineffective, piss-poor rubbish dump lorded over by a fascist maniac kept in power by secret police and torture. Can someone tell our President that I think he needs urgent psychiatric help? (I’ll tell him personally, if someone wants to give me his number).
And the next time the PR people start talking in Disney language about ‘Africa’, do yourself a favor and read The Telegraph‘s article on the Congo now: The Agony of a traumatized nation.
Gear change. More news that CNN won’t mention. You may recall that the current vice president of the USA was at one time the CEO of Haliburton Oil. Well, there’re rumblings of a legal battle about to emerge, involving bribery allegations in the past. Read Will the French indict Dick Cheney.
And amidst all the fuss over the weapons of mass destruction, go take a read of an article about the declassification of documents showing that the US were extremely happy to give Saddam all the WMD they currently can’t find. Read US to Saddam, WMD ok!, and then see the documents themselves at www.nsarchive.org.
Just to demonstrate that I do in fact like Americans (despite the fact that they think Adam Sandler is funny), take the quiz known as Not all Americans are stupid.
Remember the Kursk? The Russian submarine which went down with all hands? Well, it’s faded from the news but you might be interested to look at photographs showing the nice neat round hole in the hull, indicating that it was sunk deliberately. Go read The sinking of the Kursk Part One and Part Two.
It’s rather a scary figure which pops up amidst this next article, and one hat the US media is pretending doesn’t exist, but did you know that thus far, 14 000 US troops have been injured in Iraq? Read Saddam in the Slammer.
Then, for those of you wimpy girly-boy jersey wearers and scone-eating colonial frumps who collect garden gnomes, take a look at what happens when extreme violence meets the aforesaid gnomes, at Die screaming with sharp things in your head.
It’s hard to believe, but there still are some people who honestly think that Bush didn’t know or make a profit from the upcoming attack of 911. Do yourself a favour and wake up via this huge collection of links to genuine
information, demonstrating that Bush is guilty of a war crime, at Bush
Knew – Links.
Then as always, for you thinkers out there who need more, take a read of Noam Chomsky on why the US invaded Iraq.
Gear change. As you’ve noticed, there are a lot of morons out there who haven’t kept up with the results of testing rats with cellphones in order to determine the speed of tumour-creation from electromagnetic radiation. (Maybe you and I can go visit them all in the cancer ward one day, and giggle.) Anyway, as regards the EMR devices placed close to the head, take a
look at a pix page of posing people holding cellphones (and various other
things) to their heads – at Side Talking.
Two sites that are just too good not to repeat. Firstly, any prostitute literate enough to casually mention Kenneth Tynan and Pepys, gets my vote. Take a look at the fascinating and funny ongoing online diary of a London prostitute, at Belle De Jour.
And then, much less of a bang than the previous site, but it’s just too cute as an example of the kind of gleeful violent fun you can have without sitting staring at a TV set, as society would like you to, go watch the movie, and assemble the things needed to Make Your Own Landmine.
Then something for lesbians and film-geeks (and gee, how often do you get to read that in a public place?) Two people rip into the mainstream’s habit of pairing up women in various ways, from bimbo-robo Britney and turkey-neck
Madonna’s kiss, through to all that Buffy action. Settle in for a very funny adults-only read (and yes, there are pictures) at Rating The Lesbians.
‘Gimme some of that profitable religion’ time. Those weirdo moneymaking demon-possessed oddballs who ooze over our TV screens on Sunday mornings, pretending to know what God wants, are scumbags at the best of times. If you don’t agree, look at this news item reporting on Pat Robertson saying that ‘God told him that Bush will win in the next elections’. Hmm. And you
thought the ANC’s tired punting of ancient history was nausea-making enough. See God Tells Pat Dubya Will Win.
Software for everything! How about a nice piece of software to alert you to when you need to tread rather carefully around your female partner? Yes folks, for the man who has everything, now get PMS Alert.
Something fun to look at, but not recommended for the modem users, given the size, is this next online animation. You’ve heard of Lord of the Rings right? Well, try Lord of the Badgers.
Alternatively, if you spend time in toilets, and couldn’t be bothered to stack an old pile of Thabo Mbeki’s publicity photographs to help your system flow better, then why not combine ancient Japanese meditation techniques with modern frivolous stupidity. Yup, you’ve heard of Origami, now try ToiletGami.
And finally, if you’re like me, and are trying to cope with the final segment of the Ring cycle having emerged in cinema (and ahem, on dvd at local fleamarkets), and now the world looks bleak with no more Ring to look forward to – then don’t worry, there’s help. Try The Ring Bearers Anonymous.
Until the next time, if Haitian death squads don’t get me.
Ian Fraser is a playwright, author, comedian, conspiracy nut, old-time radio collector and self-confessed data-junkie. Winner of numerous Vita and Amstel Awards, he’s been an internet addict and games-fanatic since around 1995, when the internet began to make much more sense than theatre