The South African swimming team could probably practise in a pool filled with the tears brought to the eyes of their compatriots by Roland Schoeman’s statement this week that he wants to hear Nkosi Sikilel’ iAfrika played when he wins gold medals.
Schoeman’s choice of anthem has cost him to the tune of $3-million: the amount rumoured to have been offered to both him and fellow Athens 100m relay gold medallist Ryk Neethling to change their allegiance to Qatar. Neethling has also refused to change nationality.
So George W Bush isn’t the only prominent person having problems with the Gulf.
Formula one supremo Bernie Ecclestone, International Olympic Committee (IOC) boss Jacques Rogge and the heads of several sporting codes are pondering how such a small region can cause such big headaches.
The answer, as Dubya could tell them, is oil. But the ”invade me” signs Bush sees over the oilfields shift, like a mirage, to read ”prepare for invasion” to the sporting chiefs.
United States military interests lie to the north of the kingdoms, emirates, sultanates and sheikhdoms whose sporting campaigns have hit the news. But oil wealth lies at the heart of both conflicts.
Qatar, the United Arab Emirates and Bahrain are ruled by kings with incredibly opulent lifestyles. They have invested hugely in the infrastructure of their tiny nations, but one can build only so many castles in a sandpit before the fun goes.
The al Maktoums of Dubai started giving sports administrators grey hairs. Crown Prince Mohammed bin Rashid al Maktoum, brother to the ruler, Sheikh Maktoum bin Rashid al Maktoum, is a keen horseman who decided to assemble a string of nags in England. His Godolphin stable now dominates British racing and the Dubai World Cup is the sport’s richest race.
Since Uncle Mohammed seemed to have the horseracing angle sewn up, and polo was too closely linked to the Windsors, the young Sheikh Maktoum Hasher Maktoum al Maktoum — he’s not yet 30 — was a bit at a loss about how to make his mark.
Then he found a few hundred million dollars at the bottom of his sock drawer, and started a motor-racing series to rival formula one.
Sheikh Doctor Sultan bin Mohammed al Qassimi boasts the region’s most imposing title, but his contribution is more modest — and realistic.
Perhaps after hearing James Earl Jones’s ”Build a field and they will come” speech from Field of Dreams, he built an oval in the sand and persuaded the top cricketing nations to participate in the annual Sharjah Cup.
As most Sharjahites originate in the Indian subcontinent and the United Arab Emirates has participated in the Cricket World Cup, the Sheikh Doctor Sultan is a bit out of whack with his contemporaries — his creation means something to his people.
Further up the Gulf, jutting from the Saudi coastline like a hitchhiker’s thumb at a passing tanker, is Qatar. It is this nation of less than a million souls that has Rogge and friends up in arms.
Perhaps it was the flags of convenience flown by oil tankers that inspired him; perhaps the fact that his son and heir, Sheikh Tamim bin Hamad bin Khalifa al Thani, an IOC member, could not persuade Rogge to make falconry an Olympic sport. But Emir Hamad bin Khalifa al Thani decided to buy sporting success.
The emir, who overthrew his father in a bloodless coup 10 years ago, set the process in motion before the Sydney Games, when he offered Bulgarian weightlifters passports and lots of money to change their names and represent Qatar. The affair ended in ignominy after several (real) Bulgarian weightlifters failed drug tests and most of the Qatari Bulgars quickly went home complaining of upset stomachs.
Kenyan 3 000m steeplechase champion Stephen Cherono was promised $1 000 a month for life to change his name to Saif Saeed Shaheen and run for Qatar. That worked better: he has won the past two world titles under his Arab name.
Qatar is set to become the world’s wealthiest per capita nation in the next two years — all the easier to achieve when they exclude guest workers — so it is not surprising the lures have been cast outside the Olympic arena.
Several top footballers have been persuaded to see out the twilight of their careers there — Holland’s De Boer brothers have been among the attractions.
The stakes have been raised since the 2006 Asian Games were awarded to Doha.
Sheikh Tamin bin Hamad bin Khalifa al Thani has had some success in finding home-grown track- and-field talent, but swimming has never been big in the desert state. So he waved his chequebook.
Although Neethling and Schoeman have declined, Croatia’s Duje Draganja last week became the first top swimmer to agree to race for Qatar. He was pragmatic about his new nationality, saying the Croatian federation could not find sponsors to meet his financial needs.
Swimming’s governing body, Fina, is scrambling to tighten its ruling on nationality switches, while the IAAF, which controls athletics, has already introduced a three-year qualification.
Not to be outdone, Bahrain — a collection of 33 islands west of Qatar — signed up Morocco’s Rashid Ramzi just before the IAAF rules took effect. He promptly became the first man to win the 800m- and 1 500m-double at this year’s world championships.
Bahrain’s King Hamad bin Isa al Khalifa doesn’t have the excuse of an Asian Games to organise, raising the spectre of a team-buying contest among the Gulf’s royal families that would make a mockery of international events.
But, for South Africans who pour scorn on these oil-fuelled games, remember two short words — Zola Budd.