It’s May. The rain has stopped and one can now see the dead leaves. I hate autumn with its browning grass, shedding of leaves and the uncertainty of whether it’s going to be an acceptable winter or a freezing winter — freezing to me being anything below 20 degrees centigrade.
It has been two months since I resolved to get myself a maid and I have not yet done so, because I have been too busy during the week and too lethargic during the weekends. But I cannot do all the housework alone anymore so today is the day. Besides, I have done my seasonal wardrobe upgrade and there is no space for the extra clothes, so going to the halfway house will therefore serve two purposes. Vuyo is taking his sons to see his family in Soweto today and Siz, who has also done her wardrobe clearance, is coming to pick me up.
I hope Marita is still there. She’s a sweet Afrikaans girl from Kroonstad I’ve talked to the few times that I have gone to do voluntary bookkeeping at the halfway house. She is funny, seems quite intelligent and from my few conversations with her she is “right on” in her approach to life. And of course, she is white.
Siz arrives wearing a BabyPhat tight tank top in pink, a pair of BabyPhat blue jeans and some pink Pumas. Her casual look is so well pulled-off that she looks as though she is in her very early twenties and would make many in that demographic jealous. More importantly, she is making me feel dowdy in my coffee and cream khakis and tee. Dammit, I am really beginning to feel as though “my butt looks big in this”, but it wouldn’t look too good if I went to change, so I just get on with it.
“Hey girl, looking good,” I say to her.
“You don’t look like the mother of a five-year-old, so pretty good yourself,” she responds. It’s not really a compliment, but I dutifully give the prerequisite Continental European three kisses for intimates. I’m still not used to kissing people on the lips, àla most South Africans — it feels too much like a violation. With Mandla’s mother, it even begins to feel like incestuous lesbianism. Eeuw!
Siz and Mandla are the only ones who have been apprised of what is about to happen, and with this in mind she says, “I can’t wait to see the look on Lauren’s face when she gets hold of the situation.”
“Girl, just chill. You know what Lauren’s like, so if I get the white girl, please be cool about it and act like it’s the most normal thing in the world,” I say.
She responds with a laugh, “But it isn’t, is it? Boy, I love South Africa. Only here can you think of baiting your white friend by getting a white maid, while all your sisters in England have white babysitters.”