Robert Kirby
CHANNELVISION
I used to admire Warren Beatty, both as an accomplished actor and as a Hollywood “celebrity” a cut above the usual run of plastic idols. I now despise him, the reason being no more than his acceptance speech at last week’s Oscars.
We’ve most of us seen quite a few televised Oscar ceremonies, grown used to listening to the coy posturings of the participants as each year they trot out all those heartwarming cosmetics about the “creative” and “human” and “global” facets of their “world”. The Oscars ceremony always hosts an unseen but virile guest in a constant irony: the cultural pretensions of an industry which in fact is almost solely obsessed with profit.
Apart from the misfortune of hearing the sort of speech made by Mr Beatty, watching any Oscars ceremony can be made even more wretched if you happen recently to have watched any previous Oscar winners. I did by finally yielding to having a go at watching the film Titanic, which M-Net thoughtfully broadcast the day before they showed the Oscars.
I’ve steadfastly avoided seeing Titanic. Its overkill marketing was quite enough, brief glances at the film through its trailers and excerpts only reinforced my fears. Last Sunday, though, I sat down to watch as much as I could. I found I could take about 10 minutes at a time. I then needed 10 minutes in the open air to let the nausea subside. I later found I could stretch the 10 minutes to 12 by keeping the sound muted. Can there ever have been quite so disagreeable a product of gutter sentimentality?
Yet in its year Titanic engulfed nearly all the Oscars, a fact which doesn’t do your faith much good when you witness a new Oscar ceremony the evening after watching Titanic.
And then, when you get served up with something like Mr Warren Beatty’s acceptance speech for a special award, the thing becomes extremely unpleasant. Listening to Mr Beatty I wondered by what process self-fascination becomes this intense. The only one I can think of this ardent was Muhammad Ali in his heyday. At least when Ali went out and brutally assaulted his colleagues he did it one at a time. Beatty’s speech despoiled the entire community of actors and directors with a five-minute address which seemed to last 20. Every last clich and platitude came drooping out of him, delivered through gusts of self-effacing smiles and bogus dole. The cameo was completed by the presence of a smirking Jack Nicholson in the background. As a quintessence of the prevailing Hollywood mythology all it lacked was Robin Williams pulling funny faces.
The whole Oscars thing ran out of steam 10 years ago. The thing has become cold and dry. Each year is almost exactly the same as the year before. There are only so many times such ferocious narcissism can be maintained and remain interesting. They should find something new.
Looking at Newshour last Sunday gave me a first glimpse of Dr Ian Roberts, senior adviser to the health ministry. Roberts was grieving on about the high costs of drugs and intimating, as is usual these days, that the incessant failures of the government to supply an effective health service are almost entirely the fault of corruptly greedy drug companies – that’s this week’s excuse, anyway. I imagine there’s a kernel of truth in what he says but I would humbly suggest that if the health ministry hopes to retain whatever flakes of credibility it still has, it should try not to use Dr Roberts as public spokesperson. Whatever his abilities behind the scenes, on television he just looks shifty, what with his furtive eyes and a voice like a dying bagpipe.
I wonder when the SABC is going to pump up some of its often bragged-about independence and produce a documentary which lays true blame for the current HIV/Aids explosion on the Sarafinas, Virodenes, late-night Internet scraping and all the other lamentable tactics which have left South Africa only second to Zimbabwe in global infection rates. Trying in retrospect to assign the culpability for this utter disaster on the drug companies is like blaming compressed air for the rupture of an ancient tyre
A small celebration went past last week with no acknowledgement from the SABC. Last Thursday was the 5 000th time Graeme Hart repeated his opening phrase: “A very good evening to you. Time for a brief look at the weather.” Well done Graeme and may all your pressures be high.