Kevin Keegan signed ”Spiderman” to boost Newcastle’s chances of success in the new season.
But unless the inspirational manager can change himself into Superman as well, the Magpies are probably in for another season of frustration and turmoil.
From weekly speculation over Michael Owen’s future to doubts over whether he should have kept Joey Barton — fresh out of jail and with a reputation for violence in the streets and on the training ground — Keegan still has a mountain of problems at St James’ Park.
Apart from the arrival of Jonas ”Spiderman” Gutierrez, who is nicknamed so because he puts on a mask to celebrate his goals, there is little to suggest this season’s squad is any better than the one that laboured through the last term and went nine league and cup games without a victory after Keegan’s arrival in January.
Newcastle fans hate being reminded that their team hasn’t won the league title since 1927 or the FA Cup since 1955 or anything since the 1969 European Fairs’ Cup, the forerunner to the Uefa Cup.
Keegan, who got the team close to the league title in his first spell between 1992 and 1997, has been brought back to try again. So far, there are no signs of the Keegan magic making anything happen. Maybe it’s not there anymore.
Gone is the supreme optimism that Keegan possessed in his previous time as manager of Newcastle where he guided the team to a second-place finish behind Manchester United, but also saw his team toss away a 12-point lead.
Now Keegan is far more pragmatic and even ran into trouble with the club’s owners by saying that the traditional top four — Manchester United, Chelsea, Arsenal and Liverpool — will be the top four again, although maybe in a different order, and that the other 16 clubs are chasing fifth place.
But that could also be out of Newcastle’s reach and Keegan will have to rely heavily on the patience of the Magpies fans, who have waited so long to see their team win a trophy.
”The challenge is there, it is there to be done. But I don’t think it can be done in a year or two,” said Keegan, who is eight months into a three-and-a-half-year contract. ”We might not have the biggest squad this season and we might not have the best squad in the Premier League because there are some big clubs out there with big squads and a lot of quality players.
”But we can be the fittest team, and that is what we have tried to do.”
That might not be enough to satisfy the Magpies fans who want to see star names and entertaining, attacking football, the sort of play Keegan was famous for as a player.
Keegan knows the fans well enough to appreciate that a repeat of last year’s 12th-place finish or anything worse will not be good enough. Newcastle has to either win a cup trophy or finish high enough to capture a place in the following season’s European competitions, realistically the Uefa Cup.
Keegan has to get the best out of what looks like an impressive attacking force, provided they all stay fit and out of trouble.
Owen, Mark Viduka and Obafemi Martins are all top quality strikers and Damien Duff can provide the crosses. Signed from Real Mallorca, Gutierrez is an attacking midfielder and so is Danny Guthrie, hired from Liverpool.
”Jonas is a wonderful signing for us,” said Keegan. ”I know a lot of other clubs have been interested in him. He’ll be a terrific addition to the squad. He’s an exciting player and I’m sure our fans will enjoy watching him.”
As usual, Newcastle fans will go into the season with plenty of optimism. But now many more of them, like Keegan, have a sense of realism. If the Magpies aren’t anywhere the near the top six halfway through the season or in contention for the FA Cup final, the same old groans from the seats will tell Keegan his time is up. — Sapa-AP