The break-up playlist: Nine songs to see off DAgang

Mamphele Ramphele and Helen Zille in happier days. (David Harrison, M&G)

Mamphele Ramphele and Helen Zille in happier days. (David Harrison, M&G)

Elvis sang "only fools rush in", and both party leaders of the Democratic Alliance and Agang SA would have been wise to heed this advice. Alas, they didn't. And now, five days after a premature public display of affection for one another, things have indeed fallen apart.

If there's no playlist, the break-up didn't happen.
So here's a look at nine songs to help kick-start the healing process for both parties.

1. Adele: Someone like you

This song may seem a bit preemptive, but it's a suitable dedication from both sides. And yes Helen Zille, we are sure you will find someone new.

2. The Manhattans: Let's just kiss and say goodbye

We can only hope that Mamphela Ramphele's words were as classic as the first three lines from this Manhattan's song: "This has got to be the saddest day of my life/ I called you here today for a bit of bad news/ I won't be able to see you anymore"

3. CeeLo-Green: Forget you

Trying to imagine a jilted Zille singing along to these lines: "Now baby, baby, baby why d'you wanna wanna hurt me so bad?" can prove to be quite entertaining.

4. Taylor Swift: We are never ever getting back together

Ah, the finality of it all.

5. Carly Simon: You're so vain
Many members of the public's view with regards to Mamphela's arrogance and attitude, she did "walk in to the party, like she was walking onto a yacht".

6. Destiny's Child: I'm a survivor

Here's hoping Mamphela's constant swaying doesn't deter her followers too much and that Agang SA does survive.

7. Alanis Morissette: You learn

This one goes out to both parties. Take the lessons and run … preferably forward.

8. Eminem and Rihanna: Love the way you lie

And for the biggest "will they won't they" couple in politics, post-divorce, this line seems most fitting: "Next time? There won't be no next time!" 

9. Kanye West: Heartless

One line in this song resonates slightly more than all the others: "How could you be so Doctor Evil?" 

Haji Mohamed Dawjee

Haji Mohamed Dawjee

Haji Mohamed Dawjee became Africa’s first social media editor in a newsroom at the Mail & Guardian, where she went on to work as deputy digital editor and a disruptor of the peace through a weekly column. A stint as the program manager for Impact Africa – a grant-disbursing fund for African digital journalists – followed. She now pursues her own writing full time by enraging readers of EWN and Women 24 with weekly and bi-monthly columns respectively. She also contributes to the Sunday Times and a range of other publications. Mohamed Dawjee's inaugural book of essays: Sorry, not sorry: Experiences of a brown woman in a white South Africa, is due for release by Penguin Random House in April 2018.Follow her on Twitter: @sage_of_absurd Read more from Haji Mohamed Dawjee

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