An impressive number and range of people pitched up at the conference. They were business people; city officials and politicians; informal traders; cultural activists; tourism types and the odd international tourist who was simply following the crowd to see what all the fuss was about.
The fuss was about what to do with the eastern part of the city of Cape Town, an area housing some of the city’s most historic buildings such as the Castle of Good Hope and the City Hall from where Madiba first spoke to the world on his release from prison, as well as newer attractions like the District Six Museum. It was an area protesting its demise and toyi-toying for some kind of renewal.
The panel of speakers presented stimulating papers, with Zayd Minty making a strong case for the area to be developed as Cape Town’s cultural precinct, pointing to international and local examples where the creative industries had been key drivers of urban regeneration.
It was here that the announcement was made that Cape Town had won the bid to host the Homeless Soccer World Cup tournament in 2006. This was certainly a novel approach to urban renewal: bring the world’s homeless to the area for a soccer tournament. And why not? Cities bid for international sports events precisely to kick-start capital infrastructure projects, boost tourism, create jobs and have the athletes’ villages help to solve housing problems. Except, I’m not sure that the Homeless Soccer World Cup participants will have an athletes’ village. That sounds like a sell-out. So where will the teams and their supporters stay? On the Grand Parade? I’m still wondering whether this is simply a cunning strategy in which governments and businesses in major cities deal with homelessness by exporting homeless people on an annual basis to other countries to participate in some or other sports event.
Next we’ll be having the Homeless Grand Prix, with souped-up shopping trolleys travelling the circuits of major cities. There won’t be any pit stops, but drivers will have the option of emptying bins along the way.
Then there’ll be the Homeless Olympics featuring, among others, the car-guard sprint with participants competing to point out a parking bay. There’ll be plenty of weightlifting where competitors will collect all sorts of waste for the cycling event, or make that the recycling event. A major race will be the robot retail decathlon. Participants will have to sell as many hangers, plastic bags, wire ornaments, lampshades, Cokes, Big Issues, key rings, toolkits, cellphone accessories and old New National Party membership cards during a 30 second robot sequence. Green will be “on your marks”; orange “get set” and red will mean “go”.
Like all major international sports events, the Homeless Soccer World Cup tournament will require an arts component. But the organisers and sponsors will no doubt be pleased that they will need to invest little in this area, as there will be bound to be lots of improvised street theatre.
The opening ceremonies at all these events will feature a massed choir of participants and supporters singing the Ladysmith Black Mambazo song, Homeless. And the closing ceremony will feature a slight variation called Still Homeless.
Many of the country’s leading arts companies still don’t know whether they will receive the annual subsidies that they have received from the National Arts Council in the past three years. If they don’t, some of them will have to shut down and the Homeless Soccer World Cup tournament will then have its own resident — in a manner of speaking — artists. Hopeless.