So, you have a little bit of money and you want to go someplace. You can either rely on the glossy handouts from your local travel agency, or you can do a little bit of online snooping in advance — and create the mother of all trips for yourself. But let’s look at local prices briefly, which are sufficient reason for projectile vomiting all by themselves.
In normal societies, you can treat a plane like a bus and just go get on it and fly. Here in South Africa, it’s rip-off time if you want to head off someplace at only a day or two’s notice. (Local travel companies and airlines seem to cater generally for the anally obsessive advance planners who know what they want to do in three months’ time.)
Furthermore, most of the local info you find online comes from agencies that seem to be basically in cahoots with local airlines, so the result is that the consumer gets thoroughly shafted.
Take your standard Jo’burg to Cape Town flight: just to decide to get on a plane at the last minute is a really costly exercise. Kulula has more or less normal-priced tickets (R460, R600 for singles) but you need to book weeks in advance. Look at Kulula Low Fare Finder.
The national carrier, South African Airways (SAA, the nearest thing to a vampire I’ve ever seen in daylight), seems to think that R1 500 for the same one-way ticket is acceptable. See how unlikely it will be to get on a plane without warning, at Fly SAA. At 1time, the prices are back down to about R460, and it appeared even to have seats available — check at 1time Airline. At Nationwide Airlines, it is R700 for a one-way flight.
For a quick comparative check of prices (and it is rather funny that SAA doesn’t feature as a “discount” airline at all), use the online tool at Which Budget: Cheap Flights from Johannesburg.
You will notice that it is cheaper to fly from London to Hong Kong than from London to Jo’burg — look at the prices of worldwide travel at Get Packing: Discount Flights.
Local travel agents have this perverse idea that you really want to go to a foreign country and share a room with a total stranger. (Gee, that really makes you want to get drunk, find whores and store expensive newly bought gadgets in your room, doesn’t it?)
Look at the various package deals available, which all quietly hide the fact that you’re sharing your sleeping space with a potential Hannibal Lector — unless you pay extra, usually from R800 to R1000 or more. Then add another potential R800 to R950 for “airport taxes” (Hong Kong airport tax, for instance, is in the R950 range).
Now do the maths and browse the following sites, adding the unmentioned extra figures, at Pentravel, Seekers Travel, Rennies Travel and Student Travel.
Things do get massively cheap once you’re out of South African airspace, though. Do some comparison shopping for cheap airline tickets at Booking Buddy and Lowest Airfares.
To show you how much you’re getting ripped, once you hit London, the prices from London to anywhere else are staggeringly cheap (£41 or R466 to The Netherlands, £23 or R263 to Italy, and so forth). Go work out how easy it is to pay just for the expensive flight to London and then wallow in the cheaper airfares, at Low Fare Flights.
Another European cheap-flights site that local travel agents hope you never get to hear about is Sky Scanner. If you’re in London and you feel like taking off for the weekend to another country, go look at the Weekend Airfares.
Got a driver’s licence? From £9 (R103) a day, you can get a car to ride around in Europe. Stare at the prices at Holiday Autos.
The idea of deciding to do something at the last minute, which is frowned upon locally (presumably so that the tour operators, airlines and travel agents can rape every last cent from you), is considered a good thing elsewhere, where there is some consumer protection in place. Go look through the deals, holidays and airfares at Last Minute.
Want to go on a sea cruise? (I mean a real cruise, not this wussy local cruise thing.) Work out the real flight costs plus cruise costs at Priceline Cruises.
Remember that once you’re in the United Kingdom or United States, for instance, for the equivalent of a few hundred bucks, you can leap on to local cruises heading elsewhere for next to nothing. Look through the prices at Last-Minute Cruise Deals.
If you’re already in the US, for instance, why not hop on to existing other tours heading out of the country? It may seem bizarre, but it can be cheaper to arrive in the US, party hearty for a bit, hop on to an overseas package tour, return and then carry on your holiday. (For instance, an extra $400 (R2 550) gets you six days in London, including your flight and hotel). Browse through Vacation Packages.
Another wild deal if you’re in the US and have $1 000 (R6 380) spare: that will get you free airfare to visit 18 different Asian destinations. Salivate at the list of countries you get for that $1 000 price tag at All Asia Pass.
Speaking of the East, if you’re a hardcore Japanophile, check out these Japanese Guest Houses, not forgetting the Meet a Geisha Tour.
If you’re interested in the East, then a spot that can provide useful info is Asia Travel Tips.
Curious about the one country that managed to kick the US’s butt quite thoroughly, and spawned an endless succession of war movies? Why not indulge yourself and your Vietnam War interest and browse the tours at Nine Dragons? Specifically try its ‘Revisiting the Vietnam War’ Tour. There’s more on the war at Travel to Vietnam (although it seems to be a little secretive about its prices).
By the way, a wide assortment of hotels and tours in Asia can be found here.
Another way to avoid the profiteering of local travel agencies is to bypass them entirely. A great starting point for a huge number of travel and globetrotting links and tips is USA Today’s Travel. For more helpful hints, tips, and bargains see Smarter Travel.
Want to guess how much a room in London will set you back per day? Try R230. (That’s cheaper than Cape Town prices.) Take a look at the smallest hotel rooms in Europe, at the perfect cheapo price — first read the USA Today article, then dive into cut-rate prices at Easy Hotels.
And here’s yet another site with cool and cheap accommodation: Travellers Point.
The above links should provide you with a huge quantity of cheaper options than what you’re used to. Do some internet browsing and comparison shopping, and see that you don’t have to be locked into the high-priced accommodation and travel prices that local agencies suggest is the norm. It isn’t.
It’s your world — go explore it.
Finally, just for the geeks, browse WiFi Hot Spots by Country.
Until the next time, if outraged travel agents don’t get me.
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