Mail & Guardian
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101 ways to end a career

”Sports journalism is an oxymoron. I’m not being unkind by saying so. Find a sports journalist, perhaps sleeping under a pool table on the East Rand, the widening moat of drool…

Park of darkness

The fag-end of a Cape Town summer is a bad-tempered swelter. The heat is frayed, its December esprit evaporated with the ice-cream and tourists. What remains is an exhausted,…

Exhibitionists, one and all

By far the most popular attractions each year at Sasol SciFest, the exhibitions are set to outdo themselves this year with the return of old favourites, some fresh young blood…

Flat dogs, preppies and muti

If you are too young to have learnt to spell the word “science”, don’t worry – Sasol SciFest has a special programme for children aged four to eight. Called the Playfair,…

Viva Thuthuka

Putting women at the forefront of scientific research has been one of the greatest challenges of the National Research Foundation (NRF). The object of the NRF is to support and…

A new dictionary of received ideas (III)

"The audience was now openly hostile, its mute boredom transformed into a continuous murmur of discontent, like angry bees massing in the heat of summer. He thought he saw the…

A new dictionary of received ideas (Part 1)

In 1911, Gustave Flaubert launched a valiant but vain broadside at the hypocrisy, doublespeak, platitudes and banality of the bourgeois chattering classes. Three years after the…

You’ll never walk again

Those who attack American interests around the globe, who incite peaceful native populations to fanaticism and violence, and who undermine democracy must expect swift and…

‘Don’t chase Zim invite’

Revelations that South Africa attempted to stop a Southern African Development Community (SADC) judicial delegation, declaring the mission “unnecessary”, have resulted in…

Great white hope

In the words of Bobby Kennedy, there’s nothing like a good old-fashioned race riot. No sir, said Bobby one day while we were dynamiting for trout in the Oswald Pirow dam, you…

Let’s kill all the lawyers

A few years ago a student of mine handed in a final-year essay containing the words “correlative”, “oeuvre” and “mandate”. Since I knew the author to be an intellectual pimple…

Cleansing goes only skin deep

Perhaps Minister of Sport and Recreation Makhenkesi Stofile is just dumber than a bag full of hammers. But whatever half-formed notions flitted through what we will, for the sake…

Merry sport of minstrelsy

The Cape Town minstrels have a special place in the hearts of Capetonians. I think it is somewhere in the aorta. The doctors say it is too dangerous to operate, so there they…

New sports on track

The Department of Sport and Recreation, in collaboration with a leading pet food manufacturer, has announced that legislation to legalise greyhound racing will be introduced…

Skop, skiet and soccer

The Sky News “Hijack Live” box was disappointingly immobile. As Rupert Murdoch fed the informational equivalent of white sugar to England’s lowest common denominator on his news…

Zim’s hopes pinned on Zit and Zol

Zimbabwe will host the 2012 Olympics or die trying. This was the word this week from President Robert Mugabe, as he officially endorsed his country’s bid to host the sporting…

The men who would be king

It’s good to be the king. Not that Ruddy Prince Harry will ever know. The pink Windsor, his regal epidermis eternally flaking off his sun-blasted ears, has to face a life of…

Cringe in a bush

The conversation had turned towards the literary potential of the Garden Route, but despite the Major’s staccato insistences that he had once skimmed a slim volume about a…

Branded for life

I drink Diet Coke. It makes me feel good. It helps me retain my boyish figure. It calms me down. It peps me up. It sings me to sleep at night. I love Diet Coke. I want Diet Coke.…

Number one with a bullet

One would have thought that any society au fait with the physics of suicide bombing would have figured it out long ago: what goes up must come down. Certainly, unshakeable faith…