The Fifth Column

 
How to publish a fees report
How to publish a fees report
Dear Fees Commission,
Old pirates and new gangsters
Old pirates and new gangsters
Charles van Onselen’s latest fascinating historical detective work is called, to give it its full title, The Cowboy Capitalist: John Hays...
Another Guptastic escape
Another Guptastic escape
My placard had the letters F-B-I written small in the bottom-right corner so as to not arouse suspicion. The agents sniffed me out instantly...
Deep inside the race to be prez
Deep inside the race to be prez
Report of the Mdluli Detachment to His Excellent Highness Number One: State of Various Contenders for ANC Presidency in Run-up to December Elective...
A movie exec walks into a bar ...
A movie exec walks into a bar ...
A movie exec walks into a bar and joins an ex-sitcom star and a president. “Pussy Riot,” he says, ogling the performers on stage. “Great...
The red-letter month that kind of wasn’t
The red-letter month that kind of wasn’t
After my recent calendrical lucubrations on the French revolutionary adjustments to the measurement of time, and on the eve of the centenary of the...
And God said: ‘Go braai, hang or whatever’
And God said: ‘Go braai, hang or whatever’
The lawyer’s office was filled to the brim with eight billion people — the entire population of the world — waiting breathlessly to...
I feel so germinal this month
I feel so germinal this month
I don’t suppose Karl Marx imagined the problems he was causing when he titled an essay of his The 18th Brumaire of Louis-Napoleon. Oh,...
History’s sex scandals that never were
History’s sex scandals that never were
Mary and Joseph’s ‘roll in the hay’
Free-rein special for our friends
Free-rein special for our friends
Dear Sir or Madam, welcome to the fair state of South Africa. We received your diploma and I am pleased to inform you that you qualify for premium...
A case for daisies and kwerekwere
A case for daisies and kwerekwere
Colonisers. Aliens. Invasive. Cause damage. Threaten.

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