Emma Brockes Body Language It is difficult to approach the subject of tantric sex with a straight face and an open mind when you have browsed the reading list of the SkyDancing Institute. SkyDancing, “an ancient metaphor for the ability to achieve ecstatic states”, is an organisation founded by Margot Anand, teacher of tantra and distributor of the rather platitudinous advice, “instead of having sex, try making love”. It was established to – and here you may struggle against the first impulse to snigger – promote the Art Of Everyday Ecstasy, the knack of slowing down sex and also the title of a book by Anand, which has about it the delirious quality of a 1950s guide on how to achieve orgasm and vacuum the skirting boards at the same time. Along with basic reading material for Love and Ecstasy Training (LET), the SkyDancing Institute outlines how to master the advanced technique of Riding The Wave Of Bliss. The tantric sex industry is divided into sassy, hi-tech outfits such as SkyDancing, which sell self-help videos while blurring the line between Western psychotherapy and Eastern philosophy, and organisations such as the Abhidhyan Yoga Institute, the “authentic” voice of tantra yoga, usually based in India and run by middle-aged gurus.
Shri Acharya Abhidhyanananda Avad-huta, head of the Abhidhyan Institute, specialises in “attaining inner peace” and fighting the forces of “phony new-age tantra” which, he believes, emphasise all that sexy stuff at the expense of the ancient Hindu and Buddhist priorities of appeasing the deities. The popular definition of tantric sex is sex undertaken in a state of meditative calm attained by both parties focusing on their spiri-tual sexuality. Definitions of spiritual sexuality vary between “the joining together of the male/female principles” (Kay Parker, author of the Pictorial Guide To Tantric Sex Positions, with 85 full-colour photos), and the grander “freedom of the eternal human soul from the bondages of the world” (Shri Acharya).
Both boil down to ridding oneself of the culturally imposed inhibitions that foul up sex, the net result of which is supposed to be a prolonged orgasm of anything up to 10 minutes. To this end, teachers of tantra suggest a variety of exercises through which to counter the conditioning that men and women must follow prescribed roles during sex. The SkyDancing Institute suggests imagining that your partner’s body is part of your own by assuming the yoga position of “interlocking your legs” and holding it for an arduous 15 minutes. The Abhidhyan Yoga Institute goes back a stage and suggests that you can’t start interlocking with somebody else until you are sure that you love yourself. It advises beginners to sit quietly on a chair somewhere and contemplate their body: “How does it look? How do you perceive the inside? Where are the organs? What is their colour? What is their condition? Healthy, sick, tired, full of life? Slowly, with an imaginary broom, sweep out the tension and fatigue and then gradually let a feeling of pleasant relaxation enter the body, as if a vast seascape has opened up before you.” If you can stop tittering for long enough it may improve your sex life. On the other hand, it may reveal ailments even more passion-killing than the traditional headache.