Thabo Mohlala
Although there is no cure for Aids yet, many people who are HIV positive advise that speaking out and accepting one’s status is in itself a prophylaxis.
It not only has a therapeutic effect so the theory goes but also prepares one to deal with emotional stress and stigma. More significantly, it enables the body to deal with a whole range of other opportunistic illnesses.
Fagmeda Miller (34) was diagnosed as HIV positive in 1995, a year after her husband died of the disease. What followed was an enormous battle that in the end proved her fortitude in the face of adversity. She had to deal not only with her condition but also withthe isolation that she was experiencing from sections of her community.
In June 2000, “after four years of hard work”, she founded a support group, Positive Muslims. This has served as a vehicle through which she can address the negative attitudes, perceptions and ignorance most people have about people living with HIV.
She was lucky because her family rallied around and provided her with material and moral support. And this emboldened her to face outside negativity.
“My immediate family brothers, sisters and parents were really my pillars of strength. In fact my sister took me for counselling sessions,” she says. But if this helped to unite her immediate family, it drew mixed reactions from her extended family. “Some developed negative attitudes towards me. Sometimes they would walk out on me,” she says.
“Fortunately I had already attended a lot of counselling sessions that helped me handle all of this.” She says once people know someone is HIV positive, they judge the person and “do not accept you as you are”.
In her case it was particularly painful, for while it is generally believed religious institutions offer spiritual sanctuary and moral support, advice and solace, her Muslim community ostracised her which drove her initially to join a Christian support group.
“Muslim people just do not believe that their people can contract the disease,” Miller says.
She says she has work- ed with people across the religious spectrum and all of them seem to have a better understanding of HIV than the Muslim community does.
There are Muslims in her support group who do not want to declare their status for fear of being scorned by their communities.
“I must say, however, that because of the rising number of Muslims who test positive, we are slowly seeing some change in attitude as I get invited to address them on Aids.
“It was only after I explained how I contracted the virus that there was a change of heart from the senior ulemahs,” she says. “Before that they never bothered to ask. They had already judged me.”
Where does Positive Muslims get funding? “It is actually tough. We are a very small organisation.
“Whenever I am invited to address a group about Aids, I charge a nominal fee. But not all organisations can afford to pay. And this is the money that keeps us going.
“In a sense I am glad we had no children for this could have been even more traumatic,” she says.
Miller is now planning to go on training courses so that she can offer “professional counselling”.