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25 Sep 2002 00:00
The Internet is a useful tool, providing people worldwide with a way to find information they otherwise couldn’t get their hands on, as well as letting them do things that normally they wouldn’t. So, with that in mind, let’s look at some useful and silly sites—for instance, you could always Send Someone Some Doggy Doo! Or if you feel in the mood to do something charitable for someone, you could always send a Virtual Postcard of a Gourmet Meal.
Then you could always help increase the SA web presence online, by telling the rest of the world about some of the Darwin Award recipients we have locally—and submit your stories of totally stupid behavior to I Am An Idiot!
Given that locally we’ve had to combine Dead Whales and Dynamite recently, there’s a site online that’s been around for years, containing a classic moment in human stupidity, captured on video.
A clean beach, a big dead smelly 40-ton whale, and some morons who thought half a ton of dynamite would ‘get rid of the problem’. The Infamous Exploding Whale.
It’s not well known that Bart Simpson’s ongoing prank calls to Moe’s Tavern, in the Simpson’s, is based on a real series of hoax calls. To listen to the original 25 minute underground classic, and be warned, the language is seriously adult, go to The Tube Bar Prank Calls.
If you’ve ever had the pleasure of chatting with the slightly eccentric or downright crazy, you’ll know that there’s nothing quite as interesting as the perspective of someone who’s a few cans short of a six-pack. So with that in mind, go take a look at a web page filled with Things For Sale By A Mental Patient.
Then if you’re looking to waste time online—and have the bandwidth—you’ll find three or four quite excellent Canadian documentaries on the darker side of the late Princess Diana, as well as some facts about her killing, at Princess Di.
For killing of a different sort, and it’s actually a lot more interesting than you might think at first glance, go do some browsing at The Unofficial SA War Museum Online.
And for a slightly dated but still fascinating documentary on how Holland walks the tightrope of allowing drug use alongside its equally permissive attitude towards matters sexual, keep the kids away as you watch Sex, Drugs and Democracy.
Little grey men time. Of course there’s no such thing as UFOs—if there were, they would have been written about them in the past… like at UFOs and The Bible; or UFOs and Religion. The most obvious argument against UFOs is that if they were around, then surely astronauts would have seen them. Funny you should mention that: try UFO Sightings by Astronauts.
Then perhaps you might find some more enlightenment at UFO Comments by Military Commanders.
But wait—there’s more—why not see what the CIA have come up with over time, at CIA UFO Documents.
It’s odd how when you say you’re a vegetarian, people get weird ideas that you must be one of these rather silly New Age types, or even worse—a pacifist. You can actually be a happily violent and anarchic person as well as being a vegetarian, you know. Take a look at a useful site for the veggies among us. Planet Veggie!
And for a glimpse into the big business of healthy eating, take a look at Shari Ann’s Organic.
For vegetables of another kind, take a look at a serious site created by folks who seem to believe that Star Wars Movies Are Evil! But luckily not everyone takes the world this seriously. For instance, have you ever wondered what happened to all the bits and pieces cut off people in the various Star Wars movies? Me neither. But someone has thoughtfully provided a website filled with The Hands Cut Off in Star Wars Films.
Until the next time, if carnivores and other mental patients don’t get me.
Ian Fraser is a playwright, author, comedian, conspiracy nut, old-time radio collector and self-confessed data-junkie. Winner of numerous Vita and Amstel Awards, he’s been an Internet addict and games-fanatic since around 1995, when the Internet began to make much more sense than theatre.
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