I started teaching 20 years ago and during this period I worked at three primary schools. I enjoy teaching little kids and children up to the age of 15. A day in my life I will not forget was in January 1993.
I was teaching what was then called standard four. I was registering learners and checking on those who had not received their previous years’ progression reports. At the time there was an agreement between the school governing body and the parents that all learners who had not paid their school fees would not be given the reports – they had to pay to get their reports.
While I was checking the reports I discovered that, among them there was a learner who used to be in my class. She was one of the better behaved and more responsible girls in my class. I realised she was not at school that day and became concerned. I asked a classmate, who happened to be her neighbour, to go and find out where she was. The girl was not the type who would be absent without a valid reason.
When the classmate returned, she was accompanied by the girl and her “guardian”. The guardian blamed the girl’s mother for the girl’s absence at school. She said the mother worked in Durban and had not sent money for the girl’s schooling. I asked several questions, which the guardian insisted on answering, even those directed at the girl.
I expressed my sympathy with the “guardian” for having to face such a challenging situation. I went to inform the principal. Unfortunately there was nothing he could do because the child was not the only one who had not paid fees.
I asked the girl to go to the class but she burst into tears and would not tell me why she was so upset. The guardian insisted on taking her back home. I was not happy. I asked the other learners if they knew what was wrong with the girl and learned that the guardian was in fact the girl’s biological mother.
I was worried about what was going through the child’s mind and how she felt about the whole incident. I was particularly troubled because children, when they are upset, can be driven to do the unthinkable. I asked for permission to visit them at home before anything tragic happened to the girl.
When I got there I discovered the situation was not as bad as the “guardian” had earlier claimed. The girl was devastated to realise what kind of a parent her mother was.
I had a frank discussion with mother and daughter and assured the girl that she should not hesitate to approach me if she needed help. Since that day, their relationship has improved remarkably and has gone from strength to strength. They can now relate to each as any mother and daughter should be able to.
Today I’m proud of what I did. The girl completed school successfully and she is now a fashion designer. She and her mother reconciled their differences and are now best of friends.
The lesson I draw from this experience is that nothing is as important than parental care, especially a mother’s love.
Nozi Ncapayi Skenjana is a teacher at Amavundle Senior Primary School in the Eastern Cape. She was a finalist in the category of Excellence in Primary School Teaching in last year’s annual National Teaching Awards