There’s a restaurant I drive past on the way to my office. It triggers memories of meals with children who were still of an age to regard as a treat the ribs, the burgers, the fries and the waiters who sang Happy Birthday as they carried in the cake with the sparkler.
The billboard now reads: “Book your end-of-year function now.” This year I don’t have one to go to; I am mostly relieved. End-of-year office parties are supposed to be fun, but often they are not.
One year a friend in a crisis-ridden organisation, oozing with bad vibes, looked forward to the party that its own small friendly team would have as in previous years. But the boss decreed: One Organisation, One Party. We WILL all be jolly together. By Order. The rumour was that he’d slipped the catering contract to a “brother” and was getting a cut; the shocking food gave credence to the rumour.
How do we define success? A relaxed atmosphere, people at ease enjoying one another, eating food they like? Music? Dancing? Alcohol? Creating the possibility of enjoyment demands a recognition, respect and accommodation of differences.
What time of day for the office party? Who has young children in your team? Should you choose a lunch or an evening function: the latter choice means the need for childcare. There’s also the generational issue. The youth of one large team I know always organise an “after-party”. They want music and dancing under strobe lights — an anathema to some of their older colleagues.
What day of the week? If you choose Friday, you are accommodating Christians but excluding Jews and Muslims for whom Friday is a day of worship. Will you settle on a mid-week outing?
How many people are vegetarian, or require food that is kosher or halaal? And what about seasonal issues of this time of year? I eat almost anything and have no allergies, but frankly a blowout meal was the last thing I wanted when my sights were set on a slender me on the beach in two weeks’ time. The company allocated so many rands a person; I resolved to eat only oysters.
Will there be gifts? One boss made his team members draw names out of a hat. You had to spend a limited amount of R50 and find a gift appropriate to that person.
Will there be games? Thirty Seconds is a popular one. I remember a fairly inebriated evening of laughter, shouting, waving, making faces and jumping up and down; people distracting one another from being able to think and answer the quiz questions. Another time, the same quiz game sitting round a braai with shy people was simply awkward.
Can you bring your partner? What if your partner gets embarrassingly tipsy? Staff members know they’re going to be at work the next day within their hierarchy of power relations and they mostly mind their Ps and Qs. But it happens, the need to cope with the staff member who’s out of control. There’s flirting, saying things the person wouldn’t normally say; the breaking of boundaries of what’s appropriate can have consequences for the year ahead.
Who’s paying for the alcohol? Is the policy “pay for your own drinks” or will wine, beer, soft drinks be provided, but those who want spirits should pay. Paying doesn’t always work so well because bottles of wine are ordered and there’s tension around “fair share”.
Is alcohol a sticking point? One friend had a team member who would not go to any restaurant that served alcohol. He was intransigent. She tried to persuade him by saying: “Emirates, an airline belonging to a Muslim country, serves alcohol.”
She pushed further. He, the staff member, needed to fly for work commitments and might sit next to passengers imbibing alcohol, so couldn’t he be more flexible on the office party venue? His response? Silent resistance.
Another executive thought they’d finally cracked the venue challenge — a restaurant on a popular street in central Cape Town, no alcohol and serving halaal food.
“Oh no, we can’t possibly go there,” her secretary told her. “It’s immoral. They have belly dancing.”
For that executive the office party is the annual headache. She’s decided that next year should be a breakfast — that avoids so many of the issues — or perhaps high tea with cucumber sandwiches.
The end-of-year party often highlights the company’s culture of diversity, generosity and hierarchy in ways that are less obvious during the normal run of business. It can be used for good, getting people to participate in ways that build their teams: nothing to beat the pleasurable surprise of seeing that the dour guy from audit is actually a great dancer. But it may also expose prejudice, meanness and intolerance.
If you have had an office party where you truly had lots of fun, please share with us your secret ingredients of success.
Helena Dolny can be reached at [email protected]