Donald Trump’s executive orders are of dubious constitutionality, having violated civil rights of federal workers, weaponised immigration laws and limited Congress’s powers over the budget. (Graphic: John McCann/M&G)
Extreme weather is a term that has been with us for a while now, used to describe heatwaves, floods, cyclones and other calamitous weather occurrences. But as these extreme events happen more frequently it seems that we have to accept this as the new normal.
A recent article in The Observer was headlined “Extreme weather is our new reality. We must accept it and begin planning.” It is hard to imagine what kind of planning needs to be done to mitigate these extremely destructive weather events.
Certainly the officials in the Spanish town where floods left cars piled in the streets like a particularly violent child’s toybox have some planning to do. And here in South Africa, although not as extreme, there was an extended period of high rainfall that caused severe flooding.
In Gauteng this led to extreme anger because there were rivers of water rushing down the street outside peoples’ houses, but inside there was not a drop of water in the taps, and this has been the case for months. The dams are full but the baths are empty.
This week there was also the option of the double whammy of no water and no electricity because of Eskom’s stage six load-shedding. This situation could quite easily have resulted in extreme rage and violence that might have spread through the dark and dry suburbs quicker than the wildfires (caused by extreme drought, wind and heat) spread through the suburbs of Los Angeles.
But this has all been going on for so long that the dominant emotion is just extreme depression and hopelessness. The obvious solution to this is to go to stage six alcohol consumption but due to the extreme price hikes on essential items like whisky this is just not possible.
Just as prevalent in the world these days is extreme politics, and if you combine that with extreme weather then we get the shitstorm we are dealing with today.
There are many examples all over the world of extreme politics, but we all know who the undisputed leader of this frightening phenomenon is. My daily early morning check of the news websites now has to be approached with extreme caution because there is bound to be another outlandish, ridiculous, incendiary (take your pick) quote from Donald Trump.
And a Trump soundbite can do more damage to your health than an encounter with the teeth of a great white shark. Apoplexy is a distinct possibility and at the very least a sharp rise in blood pressure will be the result of a mere glance at the latest Trump utterance.
For someone who already takes daily “chronic” medication for high blood pressure this would certainly not be approved on my hospital plan. Unfortunately this medication is not the “chronic” espoused by Dr Dre and so enjoyed by Snoop Dogg.
Trump has signed so many executive orders that soon Elon Musk is going to have to find a government worker to restock the stationery cupboard at the White House. Many of these executive orders are destructive and dangerous but the one that stands out for its extreme pettiness is Trump’s decision to reverse the government’s attempt to replace plastic straws with paper alternatives.
“These things don’t work,” Trump said of paper straws. “I’ve had them many times, and on occasion, they break, they explode.”
As if all this extremism is not enough, last week there was a disturbing demonstration of my extreme ignorance when it comes to social media. At the outset I must admit that I am going to use the extreme age defence here.
At the end of our weekly newsroom meeting last Friday a (much younger) colleague said: “Christian, you are the shadiest person at the M&G.” Even for a person whose skin has been thickened by many years spent in the hurly burly of newsrooms, this prompted some introspection.
Did I look particularly suspicious? Was my behaviour more sleazeballish than usual? Had I said something that warranted another complaint to HR? Did people think I was involved in some kind of dishonest deal?
Turns out it was none of the above and my colleague just thought that I was the person “who threw the most shade”. Surprisingly, I am vaguely familiar with the term “throwing shade” but just to make sure that it had nothing to do with my expanding waistline I thought it wise to ask for a more detailed explanation.
The younger staff member struggled to find the words, and I had to consult an online dictionary for the definition: “To express contempt or disrespect for someone publicly especially by subtle or indirect insults or criticisms.”
I plead guilty to this and am especially proud that the word subtle is involved. But I don’t think I will be venturing any further into the extreme language of the “socials” swamp. Nothing can convince me that the phrase “sliding into his DMs” isn’t extremely shady.