A buddy from the SABC dropped into the Dorsbult this week and obviously had had one zanufication-on-the-rocks too many when he recounted some of Sunday Times new editor Mathatha Tsedu’s Zimbabwe exploits. On July 16 the Minister of Intelligence, Lindwe Sisulu — on a visit to the state broadcaster — singled out Mathatha for special appreciation for his sensitive and responsible handling of Zimbabwe’s presidential election.
Before the election the NIA (National Interest Agency) had briefed some SABC executives on the importance of not stirring the pot. Mathatha was dispatched to calm matters after senior Zanu-PF officials complained that the corporation’s coverage was anti-Uncle Bob. Mathatha set about doing what he termed to the SABC reporters covering the election ”corrective stories”. Must be a term only those in the high echelons of journalism are privy to, but then another cap Mathatha wears is chairperson of the South African National Editors’ Forum. After a few zanufications-on-the-rocks, the manne decided they had been wrong all along to think the current of quiet diplomacy ran from Pretoria to Harare. Now we know it runs downhill from Harare to Pretoria.
Independence day
Oom Krisjan is pleased to know irony isn’t dead — it’s alive and well in the visdorpie. The Cape Argus recently ran a Michael Morris review of John Ryan’s One Man’s Africa in which Ryan was quoted as saying Independent editors have been emasculated by managerial interference. Lo and behold, general manager Shaun Johnson summons the editor — who summons the books editor and Morris — and wants to know how this could have gotten into the paper without having first gone past him!
Western leader
With Dubya floundering — and refusing to attend the Jozi summit — our president obviously sees an opportunity to step into the breach as the leader of the modern world. Fortunately Thabo Mbeki seems to be styling himself more on Martin Sheen’s television president, Josiah Bartlet, than on Bush MkII.
How else do you explain this address, sent out on the Sapa advisory wire, by media liaison deputy director David Hlabane: ”The Presidency, West Wing, Union Buildings”?
Summit holidays
The Jozi summit has had strange migratory effects on the southern-most tip of Africa. Parliament has shut down — although officially the well over 400 MPs are undergoing ”party training” (ja, Lemmer also first read that as ”potty training”).
Not to be outdone, the Cape Town unicity, which has sent 14 representatives to Jozi, has closed shop — postponing its council meeting until after the deliberations on our planet.
Please squeeze me
Pieter van Zyl’s infamous pitch invasion wasn’t formally on the agenda at a recent Sanzar board meeting in Sandton, but there was one item that caught Oom Krisjan’s eye.
”IRB Law amendments with regard to Substitute Players, Squeeze Balls and Player Clothing.”
The laws have changed a lot since Lemmer last donned a No 2 jersey and played the happy hooker, but is ”squeeze balls” what the Kiwis call ”bag-snatching”?
Arms and the Thami
Oom Krisjan has been a little mystified about recent utterances by failed publisher Thami Mazwai, but clarity was found in the pages of the Financial Mail of August 23: ”State weapons manu-facturer Denel turned a marginal profit into a R363-million net loss last year. The state-appointed board of directors celebrated with an average 89% pay rise and a performance bonus of nearly R1-million.”
Mazwai is one of the non-executive directors of Denel. Obviously a bit of money has gone to his head.
Princess Tony
Democratic Alliance leader Tony Leon has been under fire for his media strategy recently, and he’s just received even more pointed criticism.
Former Financial Mail staffer Paul Perreira has left the leader’s office less than two months after repeated clashes over what would be the best way to schmooze the members of the Fourth Estate into the DA’s cause. However, DA MP Nigel Bruce — another former Financial Mail personality — has so far remained steadfast in his new home.
Fat cats gutted
Continuing Lemmer’s series on what Microsoft Word’s spellcheck does to words and phrases, the latest Gates-ism brought to Oom’s attention concerns black economic advancement. MSWord does not recognise ”disempowers” but suggested as an alternative ”disembowels”.
Does that suggest that the corollary, ”empowerment”, should be replaced by ”embowelment”?
Bad thoughts
Oom Krisjan is wondering whether to rent Brazil and Enemy of the State from his local video shop after a careful read of the African National Congress’s pre-national conference document on media in a democratic South Africa. A stiff double brandy came in handy when reading about the party’s particular interest in ”individual thought processes” because these impact on its broader objectives of nation building. ”Individual thoughts, attitudes and values are of critical importance for the ANC’s success in its revolutionary mission,” the document said. ”This aspect of communication is important in our quest to intensify the culture of democracy …” Mmmh!
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