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25 Sep 2002 00:00
Okay let’s start off by looking at the animal known as Robert Mugabe. Just to demonstrate that it’s not only white people who can be deranged morons; take a read of this supposedly ‘African’ viewpoint of this Nazi neighbor our President likes holding hands with - at Mugabe The Man of 2001.
Here, by way of comparison, is a great ‘truth about Zimbabwe’ site. African Tears.
Given that only 13 or so Zimbabwe farmers have been killed, and the world was in uproar - yet no one here seems to worry about the over 1 300 farmers who’ve been slaughtered since 1994 - in what can only be a deliberate Government policy of quiet genocide. (Over a thousand dead in rural area’s and the police still ‘have no leads’? - Tell someone who doesn’t think you’re lying). Take a look at these extremely violent photographs of local murder scenes, that you won’t ever see on SA TV or the official media - and be warned - this is the side of South Africa they’re not showing you. Farm Murders. Then - despite the often over-the-top rightwing bias on the site, for a useful source of information locally, with an attitude that’s healthily anti-Government - go browse and bookmark African Crisis. Here’s another local page, much smaller than the previous one, which you should direct potential tourists to, which focuses only on Crime News.
Gear change. You always thought that genetically useless creatures like Pekinese, Maltese Poodles and other tiny stunted oddities evolved naturally. They didn’t. Someone in the far distant past, with a sick sense of humor, decided to create them. Right now there’s a farmer who began eyeing cattle in the same way, and is en route to creating tiny cows and bulls. Take a look at genetics in action at Miniature Cattle.
At last, a use for the Internet. Picture the Arctic - all one million nine hundred thousand square kilometers of frozen stuff - and two radio-collar-tagged polar bears that you can track online as they wander around, looking for old thrown-out Eskimo’s, decent jobs and cigarette ends. What are you waiting for, go see where they are now at Live Polar Bears Online.
Then for those of you interested in political history (which didn’t begin with the ANC, and based on how they’re behaving, it’s not going to end with them either) - here’s an interesting collection of Irish Nationalist Propaganda Postcards. For history that looks amazing when printed out and stuck on your wall, grab some of the very colorful WW2 propaganda posters at Kilroy Was Here.
Then for more assorted propaganda goodies grab, take your time wading through the curious art on display at the Nazi and East German Propaganda Archive. If you’re interested in British history, then for something different, try this collection of detailed political cartoons from the 1700’s at James Gillray.
For collectibles of a different sort, get your Walther-PPK ready as you amble suavely to The Art of James Bond
Something for the hetero and hetero-challenged alike. Advertising agencies are using lesbians to sell their products! What an amazingly clever and sophisticated marketing ploy! Go take a look at a selection of lesbo-fuelled adverts online at Lipstick Lesbians. For a selection of other adverts featuring sexual minorities being exploited by business in order to sell products - go to The Commercial Closet.
Then why not browse through the pix of what happens when cool vivid hair-pieces and women collide, at Odd Hair.
I made the rather stomach-churning mistake of watching the Daniel Pearl video recently (the journalist who was kidnapped and then taped as he was beheaded by Pakistani militants). A book is already out featuring Pearl’s ‘collected writings’ from the Wall Street Journal. I’m not sure which of these two was more indicative of our global culture - a video of a murder, complete with tacky video effects, spread globally via the internet, or a hastily assembled-by-relatives-book to cash in on the victims death. Pearl Book.
There’s an odd sport that’s basically legalized assault and battery, and which consists of two retards punching each other till one falls down unconscious - they call it ‘boxing’. (it’s an incomprehensibly stupid concept that appeals to the basic prurient urges that we should’ve outgrown once we left the caves, says I) That self righteous whine aside, take a look at what happens when you combine a common or garden domestic animal, with boxing - yessiree, you get Cat Boxing!
So you have access to assorted methods of destruction, as well as a variety of harmless and silly-looking stuffed animal toys. But then, why not take it further, and offer a regular execution of a particularly offensive toy, in the wildest manner possible (usually suggested by fans of your site). Go take a look at how animal toys get what’s finally coming to them at Army Tank.
Until the next time if animal lovers don’t get me.
Websurfing Supplied by Megawan: //www.megawan.net/
Ian Fraser is a playwright, author, comedian, conspiracy nut, old-time radio collector and self-confessed data-junkie. Winner of numerous Vita and Amstel Awards, he’s been an Internet addict and games-fanatic since around 1995, when the Internet began to make much more sense than theatre.
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