/ 4 October 2002

Who protects the public?

When the government created the position of public protector, Oom Krisjan had all these wonderful mental images of a brave warrior brandishing his spear at miscreants, in courageous defence of the Constition. But as time went by the manne at the Dorsbult became a little concerned that perhaps too much of Selby Baqwa’s cleansing efforts went into removing stains from government officials’ reputations while his own armour became a little tarnished.

Nevertheless, now that his term of office has ended, Lemmer was willing to say dankie — and wish old Selby well back in private practice in piesangland. That was until the report from the Parliamentary Monitoring Group of a September 18 meeting of the justice and constitutional affairs portfolio committee arrived in the bar’s mailbox.

”Matters relating to the Public Prosecutor [sic]”

”The Chair said that he had received a letter from Mr Baqwa confirming the remuneration of the Public Protector which had been approved by an Ad Hoc Committee. As he was now leaving, he was entitled to a gratuity. Part of the remuneration that had been approved was that no tax would be paid on the gratuity, however SARS had said that no contract may exclude tax. Mr Baqwa was unhappy with this. A request had been made to change the formula so that he did not have to pay tax — the amount would be changed so that the taxable amount could be included in it. The Chair had asked for the formula because they had simply used the same formula as before and multiplied it by 40, when surely it was the 40% (tax) that needed to be added to it and not multiplied. He needed to engage with the Speaker on the issue but was briefing the Committee on this upcoming issue.”

This has made Lemmer rather curious as to the propriety of Selby getting an official golden banana — jammer, handshake — in addition to what the public can presume was a not ungene-rous pay packet. It also puzzles the manne as to why the public protector — who should be setting a good example — is trying to weasel out of paying tax. And, more importantly, which parliamentarians decided to paper over this little tax inconvenience by increasing his gratuity by 4 000%?

Are our MPs so out of touch that they not only get Selby’s position wrong, but they think the marginal tax rate is that high? How much whitewash was in his cleansing agent?

A new struggle

Delegates at the 37th National Federated Chambers of Commerce (Nafcoc) Congress were perplexed when Congress of South African Trade Unions president Willie Madisha declared that ”Nafcoc and Cosatu have the same struggle”. How interesting. Black businessmen see privatisation as a key driver to creating opportunities and advancing empowerment. The trade union body, Madisha had restated earlier in the address, is opposed to privatisation. Maybe this is a struggle against a common adversary — the government.

The crying game

At the same gathering, Foundation of African Business and Consumer Services (Fabcos) president Cyril Gwala told the crowd that uniting business is like peeling an onion, because its a multi-layered process. What he forgot to mention was that, like peeling an onion, it can also bring tears to your eyes. Just ask Kevin Wakeford of the South African Chamber of Business about his botched merger attempt with Nafcoc.

Handbags

Last week the Dorsbult was abuzz with rumours of a war among Democratic Alliance politicians in the piesangland legislature over a moral issue. ”Politicians and morality?” inquired one of the manne, in a voice dripping with sarcasm.

Well, they tell Oom Krisjan, there is honour among thieves.

Die hele twis is about the DA’s former provincial chief whip Belinda Scott, who crossed the floor to sit on the African National Congress benches in June.

All very well, but the DA’s acting chief whip Radley Keys points out that Scott continues to draw the chief whip’s allowance (about R3 000, Lemmer is told). And she continues to use the parking allocated to the chief whip, prompts her former colleague, Margaret Ambler-Moore.

Scott says she is merely adhering to the Constitutional Court’s instructions until it decides on the legality of the floor-crossing legislation. The court had ordered that the status quo be maintained and no change be made in the benefits enjoyed by the members until it decides on the matter.

”But this is a moral issue — should you continue to draw benefits entitled to you as a member of a particular party when you have left it?” demands Keys. Well, in that instance, retorts Scott, the DA should also stop drawing her constituency allowance (apparently in the region of R5 000 a month).

Great Scott!

The following is the last part of an Engineering News‘ profile of Carol Scott (no relation, as far as Oom Krisjan knows), Tourvest CEO, in the magazine’s Business Leader series:

Married: Not married

Children: No children

Clubs: Virgin active

(c) Copyright Creamer Media (Pty) Ltd

Out of step

Deputy President Jacob Zuma is a man after Lemmer’s heart, a jolly soul who likes to burst into a song and a jig now and then, unlike his prissy boss.

And Thabo Mbeki apparently doesn’t think much of Zuma’s means to connect with the masses. Well, that is what Lemmer concluded on the final day of the ANC’s policy conference in Esselen Park this week. After Zuma finished his speech — which included a literal song and dance — Mbeki proceeded to deliver his. Somewhere during the course of his speech Mbeki decided to quote a song and promptly remarked: ”That doesn’t mean, deputy president, you should start singing it …”

All the president’s men laughed, but Lemmer thought it was downright bitchy, just because he can’t dance. And Zuma didn’t look too pleased.

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