/ 14 November 2003

The choke’s on them

The purists want New Zealand versus France. The popularists are crying out for England versus Wales.

I think it’ll be New Zealand versus England, but only if Clive Woodward’s men finally get their act together against France on Sunday.

Saturday’s semifinal between the trans-Tasman rivals Australia and New Zealand is getting all the hype.

On Thursday, both the major Sydney dailies had a go about the All Black haka, suggesting ways to counter the psychological damage caused by the famous Maori war dance.

On Friday the tabloid Telegraph carried the back-page headline ”Choke’s on us” next to pictures of the three great Kiwi calamities since they won the Webb-Ellis trophy first time out in 1987.

In 1991, the All Blacks lost 16-6 to the Wallabies in the semifinal at Twickenham. Four years later they got to the final at Ellis Park but lost 15-12 in extra-time to hosts South Africa. Then in 1999,back to Twickenham, the shock semifinal defeat, 43-31 against France after being 24-10 up at half-time.

Chokers? A bit harsh surely. Kiwi captain Reuben Thorne tried hard to deflect the most loathed term in sport, saying: ”Maybe in the past we had that tag, I don’t know but we haven’t done it this year.”

And then, with a touch of acid: ”Not against the Wallabies anyway.”

Ah. The Wobblies. They edged out Ireland by a point and then struggled to find their rhythm against Australia, but, like England, they don’t mind winning ugly … as long as they win.

On Friday in Australia, much was being made of the valiant performance of Wales, who gave both the All Blacks and the English a bit of a fright before they flew home.

In fact, strident Wallaby coach Eddie Jones has asked the Welsh backline coach, an Aussie called Scott Johnson, for a few tips.

Jones says: ”I think Wales showed there’s some area that can be exposed if you get quick ball.

”New Zealand do have some frailties.”

Certainly the All Blacks were ruffled by Wales, but they shrugged off a timid South Africa in last Saturday’s quarterfinal and have beaten Australia twice in the Bledisloe Cup this year.

I can’t see the much-maligned Rugby League trio of Wendell Sailor, Mat Rogers and Lote Tuqiri outscoring the tournament’s most potent back three — Mils Muliaina, Doug Howlett and Joe Rokocoko.

God, I’d love to see Sailolr hit form, run over a few All Blacks Lomu-style and put the home team in to the final. Then we’d see this nation really warm to Union, which generally takes third place here behind League and Aussie rules.

In the same way I’d love to see Ben Cohen spark to life against France on Sunday. The huge Northampton wing was supposed to emulate uncle George and win the World Cup for England.

Cohen, Jason Robinson and Josh Lewsey must take the game to the French … but they can only do that if they’ve got the ball.

With Richard Hill back after five weeks of struggling with a hamstring, Neil Back returning after bruised ribs a fortnight ago and Lawrence Dallaglio having a quiet time of it, I’m afraid Serge Betsen, Imanol, Harinordoquy and Olivier Magne will have the edge over Dad’s Army in the loose.

So that’s it. The purist’s final: France versus New Zealand.

The streets of Sydney, filled with video screens and hopeful Aussies and Brits, will groan as one this weekend if that happens.

Still, as Frederic Michalak, the brilliant 21-year-old top scorer, told me: ”These are the semifinals. Nothing is written down, nothing is pre-ordained. There are no favourites.”

God, I hope he’s right.