/ 13 May 2005

A dangerous lifestyle

WHY do you think education about HIV and Aids is so often linked with education about alcohol and drugs? Is it because adults want to lecture you against relaxing and having fun? Is it because they’re afraid to allow teenagers to experiment? Both these things may be true for some, but there is a more important reason: when we are drunk or stoned, or even just a little bit high and giggly, we are more likely to do things that are risky, including having unsafe sex.

Using a substance can boost confidence, calm nerves and give false courage — all useful ingredients in romantic and sexual adventures. When you’re a teenager, lack of self-confidence or wanting to be cool and acceptable means that you may easily give in to sharing a drink or a joint at a party. Maybe you get so nervous on a date that you’ll get a little drunk or stoned to help you act confident and interesting. You may get so excited that you act in ways that you normally would be too shy or careful to.

The problem is that using substances can also make you decide to go further than you had planned to. You may be unable to stop kissing and touching when you want to. You may decide to have sex for the first time, or forget to use a condom when you do (discussing safe sex or deciding to go home seem silly when youíre stoned and feeling brave, reckless and invincible). You may be pushy and forceful, or you may be so drunk that youíre not really sure about what youíre doing.

Being with a partner who is drinking or drugging can be risky, too. Some people get violent, abusive and forceful when they are high. Some change character quite dramatically and have no memory of what happens. Calm reasoning doesn’t work, especially if you’re also feeling drunk or stoned. You can find yourself in a situation that is very difficult, and many of us are still learning how to be confident and assertive enough deal with such things.

The consequences of risky behaviour can be serious. Only about 1% of South Africans contract HIV by sharing needles when injecting drugs, but for many teenagers sexual experimentation and alcohol or drug experimentation go hand in hand. Many, many people put themselves at risk, or are infected with HIV, because they have unprotected sex while using alcohol or drugs. Substance use is also a common cause of unwanted pregnancy, assault and rape.

It is difficult to refuse to use substances when others are doing it, especially when you want to experiment with life and independence. Many parents drink too much or misuse drugs and we get mixed messages about what is socially acceptable. We want to discover and we want to be one of the crowd. But no matter how exciting it all sounds, you will have to live with the choices you make, so it ís a cool thing to think about how you want your life to be. It may be hard to be different now and refuse, but it will be very much harder if you’re under the influence of a drink or drug and even harder still if you have to live with the consequences of careless behaviour.

You know what you want to do and how you want to do it, you know the choices that you can live with, but drinking or drugging can make you forget. Think carefully about abusing drugs or alcohol — your health and your life could really be at risk.

— The Teacher/Mail & Guardian, June 5, 2000.

 

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