Paddy Harper: On gleeful politicians and headless chickens

COMMENT

Monday.

There’s only seven days to go until the 1 November local government elections

I still haven’t decided who to vote for. 

There are 37 candidates standing in my ward: all the big parties, all the small ones and a whole load of independents 

None of them have popped past to ask me for my vote yet. Which would be nice: I  have absolutely no idea what most of them stand for. Then again, there’s a pretty good chance that most of them don’t know what they stand for either.

The Dagga Party (DP) hasn’t registered a candidate for my ward. Or in the eThekwini metro. 

Perhaps the comrades in the DP got too stoned and forgot to register anybody for Durban. 

Perhaps they spent the registration money on ganja..

Stranger things have happened.

It’s a pity though.

eThekwini could have done with an i-rie mayoral candidate, rather than the current crop of drab party hacks that is on offer.

Free cannabis for the elderly.

City sponsored commercial bud farms.

A dispensary in every ward.

Headless chickens 

My mind should be on the last week of campaigning by the political party heavyweights; the pollsters’ predictions; the logistics for the rest of the week and for voting day. It isn’t. I’m starving — more than usual — and my major concern right now is what to have for lunch.

I know it’s not going to be Nando’s

It’s not just because their chicken is dry and their wings cost an arm and a leg. Nando’s may have thrown Gareth Cliff under the bus over his racism and cut his funding, but for the moment, its particular brand of pre-election sauce is a little sour — right-wing actually — for my liking.

Democratic Alliance leader John Steenhuisen appears to like the taste though. How else can interpret his gleeful endorsement of his host’s dismissal of the lived experience of the majority of our population as irrelevant?

Anecdotal.

The Nando’s team have been running around like headless chickens, trying to stop  themselves — and their money — from heading over the Cliff, along with Gareth. 

As they should.

John won’t.

Neither will the DA.

We make it make sense

If this story helped you navigate your world, subscribe to the M&G today for just R30 for the first three months

Subscribers get access to all our best journalism, subscriber-only newsletters, events and a weekly cryptic crossword.”

Paddy Harper
Paddy Harper
Storyteller.

Related stories

WELCOME TO YOUR M&G

Already a subscriber? Sign in here

Advertising

Latest stories

Court hears text message irrelevant to Mkhwebane’s legal fortunes

Advocate Andrew Breitenbach, appearing for parliament, said the message he received did not advantage his client and was no cause to suspend the impeachment inquiry against the public protector

Tazné van Wyk murder trial: accused twin sister brought in...

Murder accused’s twin sister tells court of interacting with the accused two days after the deceased went missing

Those who attack funerals self-identify as pariahs

What happens in Israel and Palestine does not affect Israelis and Palestinians, alone. It fuels a global fault-line of mistrust, suspicion, intolerance and violence

Reserve Bank hikes repo rate for fourth consecutive time amid...

Economic and financial conditions are expected to remain more volatile for the foreseeable future, says central bank
Advertising

press releases

Loading latest Press Releases…
×