Charl Blignaut On stage in Johannesburg
I was so stunned when I came across an advert billing The Eleventh Commandment as ”risqu” and ”controversial” you could have knocked me down with a latke. We all know that publicists exaggerate, but honestly, The Eleventh Commandment is about as risqu as saying ”poo” to a pre-schooler. If this is risqu Jewish theatre, then Torch Song Trilogy should be on the banned list.
British writer David Schneider’s debut stage play may want to be considered controversial, but it is too busy trying to be a nice, modern Jewish comedy about a nice, modern, umbilically challenged Jewish boy called Danny and his nice, modern, overbearing Jewish mother who suffers, like most nice, modern Jewish mothers, from a Tupperware fetish. She stocks his fridge, reads his sheets, does his laundry and makes sure he remembers the Holocaust.
It goes with saying that Mrs Feinman is played, with her usual aplomb, by Annabel Linder. But sadly, even a pro like Linder can’t save the performances. At the very least, if we’re going to insist on using another British text then surely we should also insist that the accents are realistic. Instead, I found myself spending a good hour of the play trying to complete the following sentence ”Rohan Coll’s accent comes and goes like … ?”
I let my mind wander … comes and goes like the weather, a yoyo, a stray cat, herpes … But even that couldn’t make the time pass and when I next looked up, Linder was still angsting about Danny’s involvement with a shiksa. She handed him several Tupperware containers as he stormed out the door. ”Please, I don’t want to get into this,” he said. I know how he feels.
Still trying desperately to pass the time, I read the programme notes. ”Talented young actor Rohan Coll’s forte is accents.”
I don’t want to be too rude, but even if The Eleventh Commandment’s performances were exceptional, it would still not be enough. We’ve seen this kind of play before and just because Schneider fantasises about his mother doesn’t mean we have to endure another one.
Now, don’t get me wrong, commercial theatre has its place and I’m glad that a new venue in Sandton is thriving, but what kind of audience are we developing? This play is perfect proof of the fact that South African theatre is in the throes of dumbing down.
When Schneider eventually finds out what he wants to say – that victimisation is a drug – he hammers the point home with such force, so repeatedly, that we end up feeling like flies facing a very large (kosher) flyswatter.
The Eleventh Commandment is on at the Agfa Theatre on the Square, Sandton, until April 1