Krisjan Lemmer
Squabbling continues unabated between the one-time “star” witness in the Winnie Madikizela-Mandela scandal, Katiza Cebekhulu, and his former mentor, Emma Nicholson, now dignified as Baroness Nicholson Of Winterbum (or something like that).
Writing to The Guardian newspaper in Britain, Katiza complains that the dame continues to cling to the copyright to his own story – in the form of the book, Katiza’s Journey, written by the former Daily Telegraph journalist, Fred Bridgland. “Before Archbishop Desmond Tutu, at last November’s Truth and Reconciliation [Commission] hearing into Winnie Mandela’s human rights abuses, the baroness swore on oath that she would return the copyright to me as soon as she returned to Britain,” he whines.
“Despite several personal appeals and lawyer’s letters, she has since refused to return to me the copyright of my own story. Originally she said she wanted to be re-imbursed from royalties for expenses she has incurred on my behalf. But her latest excuse is that there were errors in the first edition which she wanted to ensure were corrected. These were corrected months ago, but still she refuses to return to me the rights of my own life story.”
Lemmer also hears that the dame has taken legal action against the publishers, Macmillan, to force the withdrawal of a Dutch edition of the book. Macmillan, it seems, had the audacity to ditch Winterbum’s introduction to the book, a triumph of purple prose in which she described Winnie as a “witch” and the “black mamba of the African National Congress”.
Winnie, readers should be reminded, has diagnosed the baroness as suffering from mad cow disease.
Bizarre, some of the discoveries made by foreigners about lifestyles in South Africa. That distinguished British magazine, The Economist, for example, claims to have discovered much enthusiasm in these parts for a “drinking game”, the rules of which go as follows:
“Take a fresh pat of buffalo dung, lay it on the bar and add water to make it nice and sloppy. All the lads in the boozing group then place their chins on the bar, as close to the dung as possible, and the barman slaps the mess as hard as he can. The man with the fewest blobs of excrement on his face has to buy the next round. `Spots’, as this merry diversion is known, was invented by macho game wardens and is popular wherever beer and buffalo are plentiful.”
The magazine adds that, if there are no buffaloes, bored game wardens play a different game with the droppings of the kudu – “a large antelope with twirly horns”. Contestants place a pellet of dried kudu waste in their mouths and see how far they can spit it. “Distances of 20m have been recorded.”
Oh dear! Our esteemed Chief Justice, Ismail Mahomed, has indulged in some sanitising of the record where one of his predecessors is concerned.
In the latest issue of the law magazine, Consultus, Mahomed offers an effusive farewell to the late Pieter Jacobus (“PJ”) Rabie – chief justice between 1982 and 1989 – with such bouquets as: “… authored many important judgments … many qualities … earned the respect of his colleagues …”
Is this the same Rabie who oversaw one of the most disgraceful periods for the South African judiciary; the head of the Rabie commission which recommended the government persevere with detention without trial, the chief justice who was responsible – among other things – for deliberately loading the Appellate Division with conservatives when it had to consider emergency laws?
Not to mention the Rabie who sat on the
secret arbitration hearing which effectively endorsed the Reserve Bank’s “Christmas present” of R15-million in taxpayers’ money to the Cape Investment Bank.
“Speak not ill of the dead” and all that. But with respect, M’Lud …
A legal footnote to the saga of Deborah Parry and Lucille McLauchlan, the two British nurses released last week after being convicted and then pardoned in Saudi Arabia for the murder of Australian nurse, Yvonne Gilford: Salah al-Hejailan, who represented the two young women, made history as the first defence lawyer allowed into a Saudi court.
And we wanted to sell arms to these palookas?
Talking about palookas, Thami Mazwai has been at it again, lambasting the truth commission as pro-white.
Staff at the commission might be comforted by a testimonial from Toni Morrison – Nobel prize-winning novelist and the grand-daughter of an Alabama slave – who said during a recent debate in London: “There is something happening in South Africa that’s so powerful and original, and that is the Truth and Reconciliation Commission. I have never seen anything like it … this is a breakthrough in an incredible way.”
Keep it up, Arch!
The police are to be congratulated for making maximum use of scarce resources. But it must be said that there is nothing scarce about Fanie Molapo, although we do seem to be making maximum use of him. Molapo is the well-fed chap who is usually to be seen chewing his finger nails alongside Philippe Trousier, in his capacity as head of security for Bafana Bafana.
At other times Fanie is to be seen hovering around those tragic digs for the bodies of murdered Umkhonto weSizwe guerrillas. That’s in his other guise as a special investigator attached to the truth commission. In real life busy Molapois an ace investigator with the Mpumalanga police force.
We rest in confidence that the World Cup will bring a breakthrough in the Dulcie September case.
It being agreed by a unanimous vote of regulars at the Dorsbult Bar that congratulations should be communicated to the Lesotho Congress of Democracy (LCD) – for its success in mustering the silent majority of non-existent voters to score a remarkable landslide victory in their general election – Lemmer was deputed to make contact with Prime Minister-elect Pakalitha Mosisili.
A voice identifying itself as Lesotho’s directory inquiries service immediately snapped: “LCD is not on telephone.” Now that’s what you call low-profile government!