/ 21 September 2005

More news from the cutting edge

Just to start the column in a way that’s out of this world, literally, consider this surreal item that went up for sale on eBay recently. I mean, you couldn’t make up a more bizarre object than a 1950s Soviet Space Monkey’s Flight Pants.

(Oh well, as long as they’re thoroughly washed and disinfected …)

To show that the rest of the world is quite sane, consider these recent items.

A study finds that 80% of the supposed homeless, being fed in London soup kitchens, are actually just people who are too damn lazy to cook for themselves, in their own homes. Read London Soup Kitchens Easy Food for the Lazy.

Germany has made big strides forward recently. Read Smiling Now Illegal in Passport Photographs.

In Ireland, no zombies are allowed (on television) until after 9pm at night. Read Zombies after 9pm Only.

And a hard-working inventor of an engine that uses waste products as fuel is denying that his process uses dead cats. Read Inventor Denies Dead Cat Story.

So, you’re one of those regressive types who believe that abortion is “wrong” for some reason (as if bringing unwanted and unloved humans into the world is a much nicer and more intelligent solution). Do you rant and rave, or do you rent a fleet of trucks to ride around with giant, fairly nasty-looking pictures of aborted foetuses on their sides? Look at Abortion Truck Highway Photographs.

History geeks re-enacted Lord Nelson’s funeral on the Thames recently, in the United Kingdom. Unlike the original, not many people noticed: Re-Enacted Nelson’s Funeral.

There’s always a need in life for a good screw, isn’t there? Or, at least, a justifiable news item to get away with saying that in print. Go read about the New Good Screw.

Staying with our minds firmly in the gutter, The Smoking Gun gleefully found a deeply unfortunate typing error in a lawyer’s submitted court documents. See if you can spot the problem at A Painful Typo the Judge Probably Noticed.

Still happily in the gutter, it was the turn of the sub-editors this week to have a possible “oops” moment, when mentioning a well-known gay comedian and a certain hurricane’s names in the same news-item heading. Go look at ‘Emmy Host DeGeneres to Touch on Katrina’.

It wasn’t a good week for the man arrested for public nudity who clearly has some problems, as can be seen from Man Strips in Court.

In the “Brains? Who needs brains?” department, read about the woman who employed a hit man, and then Complained to Police When the Hit Wasn’t Carried Out.

For the photographic fans who liked last week’s selection of German pix from the 1920s, here are more photographic goodies to stare at, grab and collect. First off, for a wide range of pix dating from 1938 to 1969, spend some time at the Charles Cushman Photograph Collection. (To get an idea of the scope of the collection, have a look at these pix from Disneyland in 1959.)

Thanks to the Library of Congress, there’s a vast collection of pix available at America from the Great Depression to World War II.

To get a glimpse of the real “West” that shows a reality that isn’t always like Hollywood painted it, browse through Photographic Images of North American Indians.

Some folks make a living out of the great and evocative pictures from yesteryear. Look over this site run by a “kitsch-culture archivist” and “histo-tainer” at God Bless Americana.

A few weeks before the world ended for New Orleans, a photographer took a series of pix that was to be shown at a New Orleans gallery. Instead, they’ve ended up online. Go have a look at what’s now gone, at Greetings from New Orleans.

Have a look at these strangely beautiful Ice Photographs.

For a photograph of a different kind, look at the pic of this car thief, captured on a cellphone camera while being subdued and waiting for the police to arrive: Cell-Cam Car-Thief Pic.

Fancy yourself as a good user of Photoshop? Frogs are the focus of this competition — have a look see what can be done with some imagination and the right software at the Are You Worthy Photoshop Competition.

For moving photographs, literally, the genre of stop-frame animation is a labour of love all by itself — have a look at some of the clips of East European Stop-Frame Animation.

Remember the Disney movie Old Yeller? Generations of kids got to cry at the end of the movie when the dawg died, but Disney doesn’t seem to have kept this in mind. Why? It’s marketing a dog food using the name. Look at Old Yeller Dog Food.

Gillette, like many other desperate companies struggling to resell the same tired old product year after year (look at toothbrushes or cellphones, for instance) has launched its “new” five-bladed razor! Wow. What a pity the satirical newspaper The Onion predicted this a year ago. First, read last year’s Onion article ‘F*** Everything We’re Doing Five Blades’. Now read the news item on Gillette’s Five-Blade Razor.

And to show that imagination lags behind comedy in the desperate shaving-gear industry, read this piece from Wired magazine, pointing out that Mad magazine, way back in 1979, got there first, in terms of detailing the current stupidity. Read Stark Shaving Mad.

Clone wars! Why spend money on buying Microsoft Office? A Chinese company is offering free downloads of its version of MS Office, for both Windows and Linux — go read and grab, and maybe save yourself some money, at Free Download of Chinese-Made Clone of Microsoft Office.

Do you occasionally have problems with a wet animal? (And yes, I had to self-censor my initial cheerful opening sentence here, for fear of causing public alarm and unrest.) Ask yourself: What’s easier, rubbing your freshly washed domestic animal with a towel, or buying a small electronically heated “room” in which to stash your animal in safety, until it has dried? Be afraid, be very, very afraid as you look at this Korean device — the ‘Pet Dry Room’.

Then, to show you that the world and reality is indeed a complex thing to be part of, read this fascinating online essay by a happy exponent of what he calls the New Gay Judo.

Until the next time, if sanity doesn’t get me.

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