Like two small girls in a playground suffering from prepubescent bitchiness, they trade verbal blows day after day. In the red Alice band, Arsene Wenger; in the blue ribbons, Jose Mourinho.
And the battle of the handbags remains in the balance.
This week, Mourinho kicked off by accusing Wenger of voyeurism. The Chelsea boss, 14 points ahead of Wenger in the Premiership but beaten by Real Betis in the Champions League on Tuesday night, grumbled: ”Wenger likes to watch other people. He is a voyeur. He is one of those guys who, when he is at home, uses a big telescope to see what happens in other families.
”He speaks and speaks and speaks about Chelsea. It bothers me because the guy is speaking all the time. We never speak about them. You can do it when you are top and you have a big morale.
”When you are on game number 11 and you still can’t win away from home, and when you are without Thierry Henry and he can’t win a game, he should be worried about them. He must love Chelsea. Perhaps he wants my job, I don’t know.”
The Frenchman hits back with: ”I just think that when you give success to stupid people, it makes them more stupid sometimes. When it becomes personal, I have the right to take action. When you make personal attacks that are nothing to do with the game, I don’t see why people do it. It is disrespectful and not acceptable. It is as simple as that. Out of order. I will see if I can take any action.”
After his side’s surprise defeat in Spain, Mourinho disclosed that he has a 120-page dossier of Wenger’s anti-Chelsea comments available for viewing at Stamford Bridge. He said: ”We have a file of quotes from Mr Wenger about Chelsea Football Club in the past 12 months. It is not a file of five pages, it’s a file of 120 pages, so we have a very strong reaction.”
Wenger now insists: ”I’m not obsessed at all with Chelsea. I’m at a club where I’m very happy. Things have changed over the years in English football.
”There wasn’t anything malicious in what I said. I was asked a question about Chelsea and I gave an honest answer, just as I expect any other manager to do when he is asked about Arsenal.
”I can’t see what is wrong there, or we would all have to close our press conferences.”
This goes back quite a long way, of course. Last December, Mourinho called referee Graham Poll a cheat for allowing Thierry Henry’s quickly taken free-kick in the 2-2 draw between the clubs at Highbury.
Soon afterwards, Ashley Cole, the still-under-contract Arsenal fullback, was spotted having dinner with Chelsea officials in a London hotel. Both the club and the player were punished. Relations between the clubs reached an all-time low.
When Chelsea won the Community Shield at the start of the season, Wenger said Chelsea and their billionaire owner Roman Abramovich were guilty of ”financial doping” and said they were ”a long-ball team”. After their opening 1-0 victory over Wigan, Chelsea were simply described by Wenger as ”very lucky”.
The latest ominous rumblings from Stamford Bridge suggest: ”An attack on Chelsea is an attack on Mourinho. It’s as simple as that.” And the final word from Mourinho? ”Wenger has said some very strange things about Chelsea football club. We have a very strong answer. It is time to stop because if he doesn’t stop, we are there for the fight.”
That fight continues on Saturday, when Arsenal entertain lowly Sunderland at Highbury. On Sunday at Old Trafford it’s Manchester United vs Chelsea.
If Alex Ferguson didn’t have his hands full making an early Guy Fawkes bonfire of copies of Roy Keane’s no-holds-barred interview with United’s in-house TV station, he’d be enjoying this. Wenger spent his first decade in England winning the verbal war against Fergie (if not the one on the pitch), and the Scot will relish seeing the urbane Frenchman come under fire.
Although Keane’s interview was taken off the schedule, details of his scathing remarks have trickled out throughout the week. Only a win against the league leaders will take the heat off the Red Devils after that broadside from their captain.
There’s a real chance for Arsenal to close that chasm between the two sides in the Premiership. Failure to do so will mean Mourinho wins the battle of the handbags. Hands down.