I did something rather regrettable while I was test-driving the new BMW 335i coupe and it is not something I’m particularly proud of.
I was waiting in a parking lot for my sister to finish her shopping when a car screeched to a stop behind me. The young guys in the car had obviously spotted the 335i badge and were duly impressed.
My window was open and I heard them saying things such as ‘Aww, that’s wicked bru!”
I smiled to myself thinking that that was a pertinent appraisal.
A few seconds later I noticed one of the guys walking around the rear of the 335i. He started approaching cautiously from the left until he was peering in through the passenger window straight at me.
I gave him my casually imperious ‘exactly what do you think you’re doing” look. He was oblivious.
He stuttered: ‘Um, hello there, wow, what a car.” I greeted him and agreed, and made a mental note not to let him into the car, no matter how polite he was.
We chatted briefly and he asked about the stats, which I duly informed him of, and then he asked: ‘So, how long have you had this little gem?”
‘Three weeks,” I lied almost immediately. ‘And how much did you pay?” he enquired.
‘Just over R500000,” I lied again.
I have no idea why I did that. He wasn’t particularly good-looking and I didn’t want to impress him. As he walked away, turning around to look at the car several times, I tried to figure out why I had fibbed so easily about owning the 335i.
I have never lied about any of the vehicles I’ve tested, and I’ve driven some rather exotic cars recently — including the Aston Martin DB9. I’m always quick to admit that I’m merely a motoring journalist and it’s my job to evaluate new vehicles.
I think I lied — and this is in no way a justification for the lie — because I’m tired of guys thinking that all ladies are nafs and that none of them would choose to buy a powerful vehicle such as the 335i. Personally, I will always need a five-door sedan, for the simple reason that I have two fairly sizeable mutts. So, even if I had the moola, I probably wouldn’t spend it on the 335i, but I might just buy something slightly larger with similar power.
The twin-turbo straight-six 335i has freakishly brutish power and, when you put your foot flat on the accelerator, it has the sort of surge that you feel deep down in your belly.
Of course, there would be no point to all this power if it didn’t handle well, and I’m pleased to report that it does so magnificently — especially in twisty sections — and it makes you look like a driver who knows what she’s doing.
Sleek from nose to tail, with just the right amount of muscle thrown in here and there, the 3-Series coupé represents a harmonious blend of elegance and performance.
Inside the two-door coupé, comfort is the central theme, with even the two rear seats offering decent enough space for two fairly tall adults.
What really impressed me about this engine, was the long rev range. In second gear, you can let the revs rise to about 7500rpm, doing about 120kph, before you have to change into third. Gear changes on both the manual and auto are quick and smooth.
Safety features include ABS, six airbags, dynamic stability control and loads more.
The new M3, which should reach our shores next year, is going to have to be a phenomenal vehicle to top the 335i, as the 335i manages to score very high marks for dynamics, acceleration, handling, safety and comfort — a very hard act to trounce.
Fact file
Model: BMW 335i Steptronic
Price: R502500
Engine: Three-litre, straight six, turbocharged
Tech: 225kW, 400Nm
Top speed: 250kph, 0-100kph in 5,7s
Tank: 63 litres
Services: 15000km