Three cars, three very different prices. All quick, all gorgeous as all hell — which would you choose? BMW Z4, Nissan 370Z or VW Scirocco?
Despite the claims of certain tie-dyed members of the surfing community, the sexiest car in the world is not a VW Kombi with a mattress in the back. It is in fact a coupé.
For outright automotive hotness, nothing makes me go weak at the knees quite like two doors and a low roofline. This, of course, is an entirely subjective observation. For many people, it is convertibles that rev their motors. I’ve always thought showing too much flesh is a little crass — the coupé’s seductive silhouette is a far more attractive proposition than the bare bones of a chop top.
Three very delicious examples of this niche were recently launched here in South Africa and, between them, they represent three very different price points. There’s roughly a R380Â 000 gap between the cheapest and the most expensive — a lot, in other words — and it does raise the question whether or not that extra cash buys you that much more car.
Right then, what better way to explore the boundaries of one’s options than a threesome —
BMW Z4 sDrive35i at R711Â 200
225kW, 400Nm
0-100km/h: 5,1 seconds
Top speed: 250km/h
Top dog first — in price any way. And yes, because its roof does fold away, it is technically a convertible, but with the tin top up it cuts such an exquisite line that I never once drove it with the top down. For all intents and purposes, it is — at least for this review — a coupé.
One can’t help but start with its looks. The new Z4 has to be the most beautiful car on the road. If there’s a bad angle, I haven’t found it. And it looks even better in the flesh when you really get a sense of how long of nose and low of roofline it actually is. If the Z4 does err anywhere, it’s on the side of being just a little too smooth. Like a Hugo Boss suit, smooth is great, it just hides a little too much muscle.
On the road, the car is true to its sophisticated lines. The World Engine Of The Year 3,0-litre twin turbo is an absolute gem. It’s lightning fast. Seriously. It’s flipping quick, quick in a guided-missile kind of way. This car is absolutely dialed into its mission. There’s no drama. No tyre squealing, no scrabbling for grip. It simply teleports from point A to point B. You were there, now you’re here and you’re not entirely sure how you got there. Or here.
Nissan 370Z Coupé 3.7 at: R516 200
245kW, 365Nm
0-100km/h: 5,7 seconds
Top speed: 250km/h
You’re definitely sure how you got there in the 370Z. Blindfolded, you could probably retrace your route by smell alone. Tyre smoke hangs around for a bit.
Foil to the Beemer’s urbane sophisticate, the Nissan is a hairy-chested, muscle-bound bloke just itching to hang its arse out at the slightest hint of a corner. Leery power slides and rorty downshifts are its calling cards. Unlike the Z4, there’s no stealth-cloaked slinking about the traffic in this car. Love or hate its butch looks, the car has road presence by the bucket-load. The appearance of those ninja-eye’d headlamps and flared arches in any rear-view mirror causes involuntary sphincter clenching and an automatic left swerve to the hard shoulder.
Don’t be intimidated though, the 370Z is a total blast to drive. Even well within its limits, it is a sensory delight, just don’t even think of switching off the traction control and burying your right foot. Unless you know what you’re doing, you’re honestly going to find yourself in trouble. The grip goes from prodigious to zero in an instant. It’s like an on/off switch. There’s a small storage space in the middle of the dash. It’s for spare underpants.
VW Scirocco 2.0 TSi Sportline DSG at: R336Â 500
147kW, 280Nm
0-100km/h: 7,1 seconds
Top speed: 235km/h
The VW Scirocco is an entirely different kettle of fish. Besides the fact that it has rear seats with a surprising amount of space (not enough for an adult, but the kids will be fine), it’s also front-wheel drive, which means very different road manners. It’s way politer than the other two: not only does a trick electronic differential lock — traction control in other words – make sure those hard-working tyres don’t vaporise their tread pattern, but its low centre of gravity and wide track mean you have to really wring it’s neck to make it lose grip.
Looking at the speed numbers, the Veedub isn’t that far off the other two coops mentioned above. The difference, though, is that you can feel the Scirocco stretching to achieve those stats where as way less effort is required for the Nissan and BMW.
While the car does share a lot of GTi DNA, don’t be fooled into thinking this a merely nip ‘n tucked Golf. That longer wheelbase and lower roofline (64mm lower than the GTi) make a difference and the Scirocco feels like it has a little more in its pockets around the twisties.
And it’s looks — judging by the amount of attention the car got while I was driving it, it’s a car that demands your opinion. It’s a mould-breaker and I’m not sure everyone likes it. Personally, I love its avant-garde, sci-fi styling. If those imperial trooper guys in Star Wars had a car parked in the garage back home, it would be a white Scirocco.
What to choose?
If you were in a duel, what would your weapon be? Remember that, besides looks, you’re also buying a coupé to arm yourself for the cut ‘n thrust of South African motoring.
BMW: The rapier. Slim and stealthy, your opponent won’t even know he’s been run through until he notices a growing red stain on his pirate shirt. The Z4 is exquisite and quick, it’s a perfect expression of speed and style. But no. It’s pricey and just a little too slick for my taste.
VW: The light sabre. Just like the first Star Wars movie, it’s like remembering the Seventies and glimpsing the future at the same time. Slightly weird, but completely mesmerising, the Scirocco is also great bang for your buck. For me, however, it’s a little too clinical and efficient. The Scirocco will slice and cauterise you at the same time. It does the job, but lacks a little emotion
Nissan: The samurai sword. Like the mythical Japanese warrior, the 370Z goes from zen-like calm to beserk in a heart beat. You have no choice but to adopt the caricature grimace and bark ancient magical words as you chop through traffic. A Samurai merely had to show up for an opponent to run screaming — the Nissan’s intimidating profile has a similar effect at the traffic lights.
So yes, it’s the Nissan 370Z for me. Kyuba no mishi! (appropriate facial expression please).