‘We’re having a sex party. We’d be delighted if you could come.” Well, that got your attention, didn’t it? But don’t be surprised if you receive just such an invitation soon, as yet another Born-in-the-USA trend looks set to sweep our impressionable nation.
According to press reports in the US, sex parties are all the rage. No, not the sort we thought we’d left behind in the 1970s — if they ever truly existed — involving fruitbowls full of car keys and Dr Alex Comfort-inspired practical demonstrations. We’re talking about baby sex parties. Again, let’s clarify to avoid any further risk of confusion (and litigation): expectant couples are holding parties for friends and family so that they can reveal the sex of their baby. If that wasn’t self-indulgent and narcissistic enough for you, the twist is that the couple don’t even know themselves.
The centrepiece of the party is the opening of an envelope to reveal a note written by the ultrasound operator informing the couple of their baby’s sex. A round of applause and much hugging follows, accompanied by the popping of corks and a chorus of “Ah, bless” and “It’s so much better having a [insert revealed sex here] first.”
Greg Bluestein, an Associated Press writer, explained how he and his wife added extra intrigue to the occasion by getting a friend to decorate a cake according to the baby’s sex: “Over the next few hours, about 50 friends gorged on a dozen pizzas and guzzled down some beer until it was time for dessert. Then we all gathered in our kitchen in front of the massive sheet cake. Anticipation mounted as we eyed the icing.
“We slowly cut into the cake, separating a piece. I looked. Sheryl looked. I wasn’t quite sure. I checked again. She checked again. Cheers echoed through the house as we saw the pink icing.”
Other parties to avoid
Pre-prom parties: succumbing to Prom is bad enough without spin-offs.
The divorce party: the greetings card industry does not need any further encouragement.
Baby showers: parents are showered in enough tat already.
Unspecified fancy dress: for that matter, let’s outlaw specified fancy dress, too. – guardian.co.uk