There’s something very grown up about a mid-size sedan. It’s the kind of car one should have. Just as one should grow up, get a job, get married, and have kids, one should also buy a mid-sized sedan. It’s, like, the law. Yes, one can have midlife crises and trade it in for a convertible, but not before one has first purchased the car with the boot. My dad, for example had a whole bunch: an Alfetta, a Ford Grenada, an Audi 100, Toyota Cressida— and a 80s-era 5 series BMW.
I, on the other hand, have never cared much for sedans. I’ve managed all the other stuff – job, married, kid – but always baulked at that final step into automotive adulthood. What I have done though, is spend the last two weeks driving the best of breed. And there’s no denying the fact that the new BMW 5 series is just that.
The Hugo Boss of cars
Detractors of the previous generation hadn’t much to point at except some aspects of its looks. The extended eyelids weren’t everyone’s shot of schnapps and fingers were pointed at the Chris Bangle “flame-surface” creases on the bonnet and flanks. However, now that Bangle’s radical ideas have found wholesale acceptance among car designers all over the world, that little argument now looks a little ‘oude doos’.
The new 5 Series is a genuine looker though. Bangle’s couture stylings have been given a ready-to-wear make over, which it must be said, has worked really well. Looking like a smaller, buffer 7-series, the new 5 is perfectly proportioned. Everything seems just as it should be. Gone are the little flourishes of the previous car and in its place is a purposeful machine looks both considered and aggressive. Think of the 5 series as the Hugo Boss of cars. It’s where form and function meet understated class and a recession-resistant bank balance. It’s classic, stylish, expensive and perfectly made all at the same time.
Then there’s the way it drives—
The new BMW 5 series — the Hugo Boss of cars
Boss of the road too
I’ve driven two variants — the 535i and the 530d. They sit roughly in the middle of the range, between the “budget” 523i (and its R486k sticker price) and Der Hammer, the mighty 55i V8 at an equally mighty R845k. I, in other words, had the sensible cars in a sensible car segment. And again there’s pretty much nothing to fault the car’s handling and power.
The interior is suitably well finished — perhaps a little old skool in looks when you compare it to Audi’s vision of what the inside of a car should look like, but there’s no denying its quality. One area in which it certainly can’t be called old skool is in the electronic trickery of its chassis. On the centre console next to the auto selector (flip it across into manual for the sequential/paddle option), are two buttons that let you toggle among comfort/normal/sport/sport+. Beware though, the latter requires a little in the trouser department if you’re going to match your skill up against a heavy, powerful, rear-engined car sans traction control.
Forget the heroics, keep it in “sport” and enjoy the 5 Series’ Dynamic Drive wizardry that will keep the car balanced and predictable through the curves. Remember, it’s still a big car, which means there’s a lot of inertia on your back should you leave your braking too late — though even if you do get it wrong there a legion of computer chips just waiting to steer you back on track. It really is an impressive car to drive. Agile and dynamic when you feel the blood flow, or comfortable and easy should you want to kick back.
Engine-wise, of the two I drove, the 335i’s 3,0 turbo is the glamour puss among them having won as many Engine Of The Year awards as it has cylinders. Its Twin Scroll technology means the powerplant delivers its 220kW without any discernable lag and it even in this heavy sedan, still provides more acceleration and speed than you’ll even need on our roads. The 530d was my favourite though. For the demands of day-to-day driving and the instant torque on tap that the fantastic 3,0-litre turbo-diesel delivers, it gets my vote. Around 540Nm of pulling power available at just 1750rpm means the kind of lowdown grunt you want for quick, lane-changing, acceleration.
So, am I sold?
I know this review might sound like BMW paid for it, but as a mid-sized sedan goes the 5 Series really is as good as it gets. It’s a handsome beast and the handling is remarkably versatile — from comfortably soft to pin-sharp and dynamic, depending on which setting you choose. In sport and sport+ modes, like all Beemers, it’s a real driver’s car.
So would I buy one? No. Mid-size sedans just aren’t my vibe. Totally subjective, obviously. If however, mid-size sedans are your vibe, and your wallet can take the hit, I wouldn’t look at anything else.
Vital statistics BMW 530d
Price: R633 420
Engine: 2 993cc six-cylinder turbo-diesel
Power: 180kW at 4000rpm
Gearbox: 8-speed auto
Torque: 540Nm from 1 750-3 000rpm
0-100km/h: (claimed) 6.3 seconds
Top Speed: (claimed) 250km/h
Fuel Consumption: 6.1l/100km (claimed combined)
Vital statistics BMW535i
Price: R662 412
Engine: 2 993cc six-cylinder turbo-diesel
Power: 225kW at 4 800rpm
Gearbox: 8-speed auto
Torque: 400Nm from 1200-5000rpm
0-100km/h: (claimed) 6.1 seconds
Top Speed: (claimed) 250km/h
Fuel Consumption: 8.4l/100km (claimed combined)