Listen to a pseudo Anthony Robbins motivational-speaker type and he or she will tell you: communication is the number-one key to success. Being able to represent yourself and communicate skilfully are far more important than actually being good at what you do. And good communication is a complex art, with delicate nuances, tones of voice and subtle subtexts in how we use our eyes, our body language et cetera.
No wonder then, when we’re on the road, stuck in traffic, we get so frustrated. Aside from a few choice hand gestures and a flash of high beams or hazards, we have no real way of communicating with one another out there. How often have you wanted to just stretch across into someone else’s car and ask: “You’re indicating right, are you actually going right? What’s the matter? Trouble at home? Trouble at work?”
That’s why Jack Katz, a sociologist from the University of California, Los Angeles (UCLA) and a keen scholar of people’s behaviour in traffic, believes the moment you climb into the anonymity of your car, people can’t help but simply reduce you to a brand of vehicle. Every day on your daily commute, you’re not you; you’re a kind of four-wheeled cyborg, half human/half VW or Toyota or whatever.
Why I think a driver being a brand is relevant when talking about Mini is because I don’t think anyone in the car trade in the past decade has been as successful in forging a brand identity as well as Mini has. Perhaps estate agents have gone a ways to ruining it for everybody, but Minis are still as crisp and desirable as a cold can of Coke Light or the latest iPod/Blackberry/Nano/Shuffle. And if we are indeed simply rendered a type of brand cyborg every time we merge on to the highway, as Katz believes, being an Apple Mac isn’t all that bad, now is it? At least you’re not the maize meal of the streets in your Citi Golf?
Mini’s completion of its model line-up comes in the form of the race-tuned John Cooper Works (JCW) Mini Convertible and Mini Clubman to join the JCW Hatch that arrived last year. This means that everyone is catered for from the entry level 1.6-litre Cooper all the way up to the blinged-up JCW Convertible.
All JCW Minis sport 155kW and 280Nm from their 1.6-litre turbo-charged engines, which will tackle 100kph in less than seven seconds. The ragtop is the slowest of the three, but having had the chance to drive each of the JCW range, back to back, at Zwartkops raceway, the difference in performance between each chassis is barely perceptible. The JCW’s improved power output over the standard Cooper S is thanks to an all-aluminium cylinder block and bearings case and sodium-filled exhaust valves that provide better cooling for the turbo charger that’s turned up to higher boost. Streamlined inlet manifolds allow for more direct airflow into the combustion chamber and ensure the JCW has a nicely sonorous four-cylinder bark to go with its extra grunt. Mini also claims a tidy economy return of 7,1 litres per 100km if you can resist flexing your right foot.
Not that that was in any way relevant, blitzing around the tight Zwartkops raceway, where there was little to choose in feel and lap times between the hatch and the rewardingly stiff convertible. The Clubman, however, feeling the most top-heavy, was the one hardest to get comfortable with on circuit, reacting with more heft than the other two and feeling less capable of quick changes in direction. Stable and safe, but not much fun.
With Macpherson struts at the front and Mini’s “centrally guided” rear axle at the back, the JCW hatch and convertible in particular are as good as it gets in terms of handling for a front-wheel drive vehicle. The amount of smile-inducing (but controllable) lift-off oversteer the Mini delivers beggars belief. You’re left in no doubt after a few hot laps that the JCW Mini wants to be a tail-happy 135i Beemer in its next life. With a flick of the Sport button in the centre dash, engine mapping and the electro servo steering can be sharpened up and a three-way Dynamic Stability Control system lets you give full vent to your inner hooligan.
The DTC (half off) function is probably best for testing your limits on road, but on track it has to be turned all the way off.
The JCW Mini can deliver so much torque steer and so much wild understeer (until you lift off, that is), in first and second gear, that the DTC function is constantly forced to intervene. So often a hot hatch chassis feels like it could handle loads more power, but this Mini feels like it can just about cope and that is a fun feeling.
Styling-wise, all South African JCWs come with a sporty aero kit as standard and the convertible at last has had its awkward rear roll-over hoops sunken behind the rear seats. Customisable options include Recaro racing seats, cross-drilled brake discs and any number of chequered flag, carbon-fibre trim or racing stripe decals for the body.
So, if we are all only brand cyborgs on the road, as Katz believes, what do the John Cooper Works Mini Convertible and Clubman say about you? Well, it says you most certainly don’t mind spending money in the pursuit of self-promotion as the JCW Clubman retails at R339 950 and the Convertible at R378 850. The Clubman in JCW trim is, much like the garden variety Clubman, a bit of a head scratch, but its niche appeal makes it thoroughly cool in my book. And the JCW Convertible? Well, it’s as mental to drive as a JCW Hatch, but with the roof down, you’ll be able to ward off anonymity in traffic — a little less cyborg, a little more you. Maybe you can find out if that guy indicating right was actually going to turn after all?
Long Term Update
Space, the final frontier, has more meaning to people needing to transport families and big dogs than it does for fans of an Sixties science-fiction programme experiencing a revival with a very cool recently released movie.
There was a rabies scare in the suburb in which I live and as a result I had to take two large dogs and one medium-size dog for inoculations at a nearby park. Of course, it was a nightmare because my dogs are not very well behaved and although they’re generally placid animals, they are nonetheless strong and difficult to control.
The long-wheelbase Daihatsu Terios swallowed up the three mutts plus the three adults needed to control them.
I’ve never been much of an SUV person because I don’t do any off-roading and therefore never considered buying an SUV. But the ease with which the Terios handled tricky customers like my dogs gave me insight into why people find these cars so appealing.
The only troubling aspect about the long-wheelbase Terios is the fuel consumption, which is a little high at about 12 litres/100km. Still, I am guilty of doing mostly city driving and haven’t given the Terios a real chance to stretch its long-distance legs yet. — Sukasha Singh
Model: Daihatsu Terios LWB
Price: R240 000
Engine: 1,5-litre petrol
Tech: 80kW, 141Nm
Tank capacity: 50 litres
Services: 15 000km